tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32151661916773907072024-03-13T00:54:44.166-04:00Bonk's MulletAn Ottawa Senators Blog with jokesAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14824526590372609348noreply@blogger.comBlogger429125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3215166191677390707.post-41257232145998956932020-09-19T12:02:00.001-04:002020-09-19T12:05:20.588-04:00The Former Face of the Franchise<h4>by Capital Gains (<a href="https://www.twitter.com/Capital_gains65">@Capital_Gains65</a>)</h4>
I’ll start this by saying I’m a big fan of the logo change, and I’ve yet to see anyone upset with the move. With that being said, the talk on social media is all about what we have now, and there’s very little focus on what we lost. I decided to give an opportunity to the face behind the now former logo, allowing them to finally voice their thoughts after being with the Ottawa Senators for 13 years.
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><i><span style="font-size: x-small;">2020. I (right) sit with DDD, hours after they were let go.<br /><br /></span></i></td></tr>
</tbody></table><b>Gainsy:</b> First and foremost, I want to thank you for agreeing to an interview. I can’t imagine how hard today might be for you, so I honestly do appreciate this.<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><b>DDD:</b> Yeah, it’s been a tough one, but it’s probably best to talk about it while it’s still fresh.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><b>Gainsy:</b> Let's just jump into this then. How did you get started with the Sens?</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><b>DDD:</b> It’s a crazy story. After a modelling gig for Giant Tiger, I went vacationing in the tropics. One night, some guy stumbles and falls into me. He takes one look at me, hands me his card, and walks off. I didn't think anything of it until I returned back home, and started to unpack. I find the card in one of my pockets, and call and</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><b>Gainsy:</b> Eugene Melnyk picks up? Amazing.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><b>DDD:</b> We get to talking, and he makes an offer. The pay wasn’t great, but come on, 30 teams in the NHL at that point, and you’d be one of only two human logos. It was a can’t miss opportunity.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><i><span style="font-size: x-small;">2007. Eugene Melnyk and Bryan Murray welcome the new face of the franchise.</span></i></td></tr></tbody></table>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><b>Gainsy: </b>So, your face starts showing up all over promo material, merchandise, jerseys...I'm curious – What’s it like seeing your face on the jerseys of tens of thousands of fans in the stands?</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><b>DDD:</b> Tens of thousands?</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><b>Gainsy:</b> Thousands</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><b>DDD:</b> …</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><b>Gainsy:</b> We’re talking about 07/08 here.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><b>DDD:</b> Alright fine. Yeah, to see your face, everywhere, all the time… it’s everything. I can’t get enough of it. That’s why I took the offer without thinking. It’s just a shame this face really went to waste in the last few years. Between the attendance and the heritage bulls***, I – </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><b>Gainsy:</b> Come on now. I didn’t expect to get into your competition this quick, but all three – the heritage, heritage classic, and NHL 100 – they are all beautiful jerseys.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><b>DDD:</b> Nope. Disgusting. All of them. </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><b>Gainsy:</b> Rihanna and I disagree on that, but now you have me wondering. What about your first competitor? The SNES logo?</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><b>DDD:</b> Gorgeous. I loved it. I was so thrilled when the team first revealed it.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><b>Gainsy:</b> Uhh...You’re going to have to help me out here.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><b>DDD:</b> Think about it. The initial backlash from my arrival was rough. The team is coming off of a final's appearance, and all of the sudden they're rebranding? A first round exit my first year, and then the Heatley rumours start. The end is nigh. The new jersey is Matt Duchene levels of cursed. People hate it. People hate me. And then BAM. The SNES shows up to save the day. All of the sudden the fans are now begging for my face to be on the players every night. It didn't matter what happened on the ice, as long as the SNES jersey was around, I was golden. It was a gift from above.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><b>Gainsy:</b> I – That...makes sense.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><b>DDD:</b> Mmhmm.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><b>Gainsy:</b> Although, the end of your first year wasn't that bad, especially with your first draft, in Ottawa of all places. I mean, since you bring up gifts from above, G-d rested on the 7th day, and on the 8th day</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><b>DDD: </b>He created Erik Karlsson.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><b>Gainsy: </b>Probably the best player who put on the jersey with your face.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><b>DDD:</b> Oh absolutely. I’m going to be honest though, I was terrified on draft night when I saw some 157 pound kid walk up to the stage. At the time I thought he was a garbage pick.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><b>Gainsy: </b>Do you write for the Sun?</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><b>DDD:</b> Huh?</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><b>Gainsy: </b>Nevermind. Look, I know this interview is about you, but this may be my only chance to find out, so I’m going pause here, and ask a question that’s somewhat off the board, if that’s ok?</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><b>DDD:</b> Go for it.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><b>Gainsy:</b> We know where one of predecessors ended up, as they’re now replacing you, but what about the other one. The Senagoth. What ever happened to them?</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><b>DDD:</b> I don’t know. Honestly. I haven’t heard from them. I’ve tried to reach out, but I’ve only gotten voicemail. The last time I saw them was back in 07’, at my welcome party. After that, they sort of just disappeared.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjRElxAsRsbJHvNp9PBwCrgrhSEtMCVUoh2GHAo9FWOEMdg6MrmfFC5LZGwyChFeorp1yWUEziZI27iEpvz4B19pUrdv7oVyH9hrLv-Q3p4h6U9qwOCWl0dl8Neg0lcmA43n37V5mhbLes/s600/centurion+party.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="335" data-original-width="600" height="224" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjRElxAsRsbJHvNp9PBwCrgrhSEtMCVUoh2GHAo9FWOEMdg6MrmfFC5LZGwyChFeorp1yWUEziZI27iEpvz4B19pUrdv7oVyH9hrLv-Q3p4h6U9qwOCWl0dl8Neg0lcmA43n37V5mhbLes/w400-h224/centurion+party.jpg" width="400" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><i><span style="font-size: x-small;"> 2007. The gang celebrates DDD joining the Sens.</span></i></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><b>Gainsy:</b> Do you have any mutual friends? Do you know if they’re ok?</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><b>DDD:</b> Were they ever?</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><i>After a brief moment of silence, and reflection, we continued with the interview.</i></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><b>Gainsy: </b>Back to Karlsson, I think you’d agree with me that your time with the Sens was largely defined by the Karlsson era. Between the Norris trophies, the initial playoff push in 2012, the Hamburglar run, 2017 – </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><b>DDD:</b> F*** Chris Kunitz</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><b>Gainsy:</b> Yes. F*** Chris Kunitz. But really, your tenure with Ottawa, EK was at the centre of it all.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><b>DDD:</b> He was. And those years were amazing. We put this team on the map again. The two faces of the franchise. It was our era, and easily the highlight of my time with Ottawa. </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><b>Gainsy:</b> Any other moments stand out, good or bad?</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><b>DDD:</b> Good? Not really. Although seeing all the banners in the arena replaced with my face was my proudest day as the logo. I'm not sure why the older ones were changed, but I'm not complaining. On the other side, the 2012 draft. The lockout. Matt Cooke. Alfie leaving.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><b>Gainsy:</b> Twice.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><b><br /></b></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><b>DDD: </b> The Sweden trip. The unprotected first. Year 2 and 3 of Guy Bouch–</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><b>Gainsy:</b> Don’t go there.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><b>DDD: </b>Alright, alright. But I'd say the worst part of my time with the team was the constant disapproval of me from the fans. Go with the O. Bring back the 2D. It was rough. Honestly, I was probably on my way out in 2018 if not for the #3DOut campaigns, which made me stay out of spite. </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj8lV5fYza52HFOUpUf3XIrExMZ_YwqkBBI230bp6Q4vxHVkY_Yi3Tj1Bs9HpyR4Z_vUBOfdNAra4iyybF5Ia9nNPnkkdYl4gAExoypbfSCbgIEa4NoWj2F5NyGV7IgpU_G3ZcIDnm672g/s1040/centurion+out.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="572" data-original-width="1040" height="220" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj8lV5fYza52HFOUpUf3XIrExMZ_YwqkBBI230bp6Q4vxHVkY_Yi3Tj1Bs9HpyR4Z_vUBOfdNAra4iyybF5Ia9nNPnkkdYl4gAExoypbfSCbgIEa4NoWj2F5NyGV7IgpU_G3ZcIDnm672g/w400-h220/centurion+out.jpg" width="400" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><i><span style="font-size: x-small;"> 2018. #3DOut billboards take over the city.</span></i></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><i><span style="font-size: x-small;"><br /></span></i></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><b>Gainsy:</b> Oh... well I feel like I have to apologize for all of that on behalf of the fanbase. I'm sure some are sad to see you go now.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><b>DDD: </b>Really?</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><b>Gainsy: </b>Probably not. But now that your time with Ottawa has come to an end, I want to know – What’s next?</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><b>DDD:</b> I’m not sure yet. Everything is obviously still so fresh and will take some time to process. I’ll take things game by game – or I should say day by day now. Maybe take a break, rest for a bit.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><b>Gainsy: </b>Rest is a weapon.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><b>DDD: </b>And then, who knows. Maybe I'll become an Uber driver. Or learn to fly. Rumour has it Mr. Melnyk is looking for a new pilot. </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><b>Gainsy:</b> Well I wish you the best of luck, and again, I want to thank you for sitting down with me for this. Is there one final message you want to pass on to the fans in Ottawa who have been with you for the last 13 years?</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><b>DDD:</b> ...</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><b>Gainsy: </b>...</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><b>DDD:</b> ...</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><b>Gainsy: </b>...</div></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><b><br /></b></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><b>DDD:</b> We were a team. And I was the face of it.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><b><br /></b></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg-OOS2qBcXOKK_jj_9gEm_CYsBVB6UZZAJEKOqP2Y3ofZPth4Gvpq0ru0OqHPCUvktUh6rWCvBv15QG3ioYBxE_dTRn7nyrJLDkIjvk1fi0czQ81KmkVrQhATxGUhwMEiyqyDmIDimg_4/s800/centurion+goodbye.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="500" data-original-width="800" height="250" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg-OOS2qBcXOKK_jj_9gEm_CYsBVB6UZZAJEKOqP2Y3ofZPth4Gvpq0ru0OqHPCUvktUh6rWCvBv15QG3ioYBxE_dTRn7nyrJLDkIjvk1fi0czQ81KmkVrQhATxGUhwMEiyqyDmIDimg_4/w400-h250/centurion+goodbye.jpg" width="400" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><i><span style="font-size: x-small;"> 2020. DDD saying goodbye to the only life they've ever know.</span></i></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br /></div><div><br /></div></div><br /><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody><tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"></td></tr>
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Capital Gainshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10680384558914871834noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3215166191677390707.post-4586927150155720622017-11-24T12:19:00.002-05:002017-11-24T12:21:56.531-05:00Ottawa Senators 1/4 Season Report Card<h3>
by <a href="https://twitter.com/Capital_Gains65">Capital Gains</a></h3>
The Ottawa Senators have reached the 20-game plateau this year, posting an 8-6-6 record. As a result, (and because I haven't made a post in over a year) I decided it was a good time to look back on the first quarter of the season and evaluate the players, coach and GM. If you are related to any of the above - Don't read this. <br />
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The Forwards</h2>
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Gabriel Dumont: A++ </h3>
No-brainer here. The Sens have never lost a game when Dumont is in the lineup.
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Mark Stone: A++ </h3>
An A+ results from Stone's team lead in goals, points and celebrations. The extra '+' with Stone is because his play can be used to aggravate Leafs' fans.
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Derick Brassard: A- </h3>
To his credit, he has picked up where he left off in the playoffs last year. With 22 points in 22 games, Zibanejad is on fire to start this season.
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<h3>
Jean-Gabriel Pageau: B-</h3>
Pageau has been head and shoulders above the rest of the team this year in the hair department. He's been decent on the ice as well.
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Chris DiDomenico: B-</h3>
Unfortunately for Chris Di-Demoted-o, Boucher loves his eldest and youngest sons more. Good luck in <a href="https://twitter.com/FriedgeHNIC/status/934105730981830657">Tampa.</a>
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<h3>
<strike>Kyle Turris</strike> Matt Duchene: B-</h3>
Seeing as Duchene has yet to register a point with the Sens, I am being generous with my grade. Almost as generous as Dorion was with the trade.
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<h3>
Ryan Dzingel: C+ </h3>
This was a tough one. Dzingel came close to getting a B, but it appears that the bell rang before he completed the last few questions on the test. Poor guy couldn’t finish.
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Tom Pyatt: C+ </h3>
Like 280 character tweets, more of something isn't always better. As long as Pyatt stays out of the top 6, I have no real complaints with him or his play.
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<h3>
Nate Thompson: C+ </h3>
All things considered, Thompson has actually been okay* for the Sens.
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<i><span style="font-size: x-small;">*better than Kelly</span></i>
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<i><span style="font-size: small;">Editor's Note - Expect Thompson's mid and final season grades to be the same as this one, since his no movement clause prevents a change.</span></i>
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<h3>
Bobby Ryan: C </h3>
A low approval rating shouldn't be a surprise for Bobby. For the 5th straight year, he has started the season off with more broken hands than goals.
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Nick Paul: C </h3>
I've got nothing for this.
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<h3>
Alex Burrows: C- </h3>
Even if Dahlen never makes it to the NHL, the Sens still lost this trade. Hugs and high-fives for everyone.
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<h3>
Mike Hoffman: Ungraded </h3>
Unlike his shots, Hoffman’s grade will not be posted.
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Zack Smith: Ungraded </h3>
Apparently Smith has played in 12 games this year, but I haven’t seen him out there. Hopefully he shows up before the mid-season grades.
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<h2>
The Defense</h2>
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<h3>
Thomas Chabot: A </h3>
This was an easy choice with Chabot having 3 assists in 4 games this year. Additionally, I have to go with the coach on this one since Boucher has been associating him with the A all season.
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Erik Karlsson: A- </h3>
Since he is still recovering from ankle-removal surgery, Karlsson has looked sluggish to start the season. This makes him the best defenseman in the league by only a medium-margin.
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<i><span style="font-size: small;">Editor's Note - Karlsson would have received an A+ if he was from Ontario.</span></i>
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<h3>
Freddy Claesson: B</h3>
With the team losing Marc Methot to the expansion draft, someone needed to step up both as a player and a personality. I think it's safe to say that Freddy has been that guy. Two <strike>thumbs</strike> <a href="https://twitter.com/Senators/status/909545197574508544">arms up.</a>
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<h3>
Dion Phaneuf: B
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This grade was solely based on his <a href="https://www.instagram.com/p/Ba7u8dvAED5/?hl=en&taken-by=dionphaneuf">Halloween costume.</a>
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Mark Borowiecki: B- </h3>
I didn’t think this was possible. Keep up the good work, Mark.
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Ben Harpur: C+</h3>
I initially gave Harpur a C, however, that was before I realized he's 6'6. Clearly I was wrong with my initial evaluation.
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<h3>
Ceci: D- </h3>
Like a few GMs around the league, I was going to deal out an F for Ceci, but Dorion refused it.
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<br />
<h3>
Johnny Oduya: F</h3>
To be honest, as bad as he's been, I don't think Oduya's season has been a complete failure. With that being said, I didn't want to grade Johnny a D, since he isn't very good at it.
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<br />
<h3>
Chris Wideman: F</h3>
Personally, I think Wideman deserves a B, but the team sees him as an F for some reason, so I guess I have to live with their decision.
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<br />
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<h2>
The Goalies</h2>
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<h3>
Craig Anderson: C </h3>
Unfortunately for Anderson, this is the only time when an 89.6% doesn’t result in an A+.
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<h3>
Mike Condon: D </h3>
Like any University during O-Week, there have been plenty of Condon giveaways that resulted in someone scoring.
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<br />
<br />
<h2>
The Coach</h2>
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<h3>
Guy Boucher: D </h3>
Although a bit low, I don't think Boucher will be upset with my decision. With another D, there are more ways for him to go 11-7.
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<br />
<h2>
The GM</h2>
<br />
<h3>
Pierre Dorion: F </h3>
Realistically, until he trades Ceci, one for one, I can't go higher than this.
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<br />Capital Gainshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10680384558914871834noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3215166191677390707.post-161376803178902592017-11-14T18:24:00.001-05:002017-11-14T19:15:05.874-05:00An Updated History of Ottawa Senators Jerseys<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: initial; font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;">When walking around the concourse of Canadian Tire Centre, it is </span><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;">immediately</span><span style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: initial; font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"> apparent that the Ottawa Senators have a diverse jersey history. From the simplistic Karlsson Heritage #65 to the time bending Zack Smith on a red Senagoth #15 because it was a </span><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;">Heatley</span><span style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: initial; font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"> jersey, and even to the hilarious white 2D with Leafs Suck #69 on it, it can be almost impossible to pick a favourite. Let's check out some of these things.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: initial; font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: initial;">(most of the images from </span><a href="https://www.blogger.com/goog_1966960283">nhljerseys</a><span style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: initial;"><a href="http://.comhttp//www.nhluniforms.com/Senators/SenatorsNEW.html">.com</a>)</span></span></div>
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<span style="-webkit-font-kerning: none;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;"><br /></span></span></h3>
<span style="-webkit-font-kerning: none;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;"><b><u>Not Real Jersey</u></b></span></span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjXmOmadEZAIWzWwCC9nUjaFAUfxTViXAMXEfz-qmX6STwJk_Aa0Z15DliC5jQ6Zx5zQIBznz-Eii-hEWp7c1XEjycUgaTa8jHtZP0lB9g-54sd9Y9pDa5NjlKSpofNjIYabNH7Ned7FfM/s1600/Unknown-2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="233" data-original-width="175" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjXmOmadEZAIWzWwCC9nUjaFAUfxTViXAMXEfz-qmX6STwJk_Aa0Z15DliC5jQ6Zx5zQIBznz-Eii-hEWp7c1XEjycUgaTa8jHtZP0lB9g-54sd9Y9pDa5NjlKSpofNjIYabNH7Ned7FfM/s1600/Unknown-2.jpg" /></a></div>
<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;">When the Bring Back the Senators campaign was going on, this inverted New Jersey Devils 2017 looking jersey was introduced. Management clearly wanted the “Washington Capitals logo except what if Ottawa?” look here. The NHL decided that this logo was too boring of a logo for a professional sports team so it was never actually worn in a game. Shoutout to the early Senators for selling Giant Tiger looking jerseys to unsuspecting fans before making an abrupt switch to an ancient Roman gladiator theme.</span></div>
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<span style="-webkit-font-kerning: none;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><b><u>Gladiator 1.0 (1992-1995)</u></b></span></span><br />
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<a href="http://www.nhluniforms.com/Senators/Images/Senators01.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><img border="0" src="http://www.nhluniforms.com/Senators/Images/Senators01.png" data-original-height="440" data-original-width="480" height="293" width="320" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: initial; font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-kerning: none;">The Senators unveiled a theme that didn’t really make a whole lot of sense but produced some really nice unilingual jerseys. Turns out people who bought the Bring Back The Senators jersey realized their jerseys were not actual Sens jerseys and got angry. ’’It was a scam,'' said Dean Vasilas, 25, who has Senators season tickets. ''We're being used. We're proud we got the team, and every time we turn around they always get more money out of our pockets.’’ Ottawa Citizen, May 18, 1991) Dean’s powerful message against mass consumerism resonates with working people to this day. Many thought </span></span><span style="text-align: center;">that the logo looked like a US college football while others thought it looked like the Trojan condoms logo (</span><span style="text-align: center; text-decoration: underline;">nice</span><span style="text-align: center;">). The jersey was slightly altered after one season by changing the numbers from red with white trim to white with red trim. </span></span></div>
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<a href="http://www.nhluniforms.com/Senators/Images/Senators02.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><img border="0" src="http://www.nhluniforms.com/Senators/Images/Senators02.png" data-original-height="440" data-original-width="480" height="293" width="320" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><b><u>Gladiator 2.0 (1995-1997)</u></b></span><br />
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<a href="http://www.nhluniforms.com/Senators/Images/Senators04.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><img border="0" src="http://www.nhluniforms.com/Senators/Images/Senators04.png" data-original-height="440" data-original-width="480" height="293" width="320" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-kerning: none;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;">The first kinda significant jersey change happened in 1995 when the striping on the road jerseys got some white infusion. Notable players who have used this jersey are melon Jofa Alfredsson, playoff Duchesne (1.0), and NAC Yashin.</span></span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><u>
Senagoth Phase 1 (1997-2000)</u></span></b></div>
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<a href="http://www.nhluniforms.com/Senators/Images/Senators05.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><img border="0" src="http://www.nhluniforms.com/Senators/Images/Senators05.png" data-original-height="660" data-original-width="480" height="320" width="232" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;">After Rod Bryden’s kid played around on Microsoft Paint for Windows 95, the Sens introduced this weird abstract jersey. This should’ve been filed with the Islanders’ fish sticks jerseys, the Pittsburgh “Rangers” jersey, and the Canucks’ gradient jersey as some of the worst 90s/2000s designs. The team also subtly changed the unilingual “Ottawa Senators” on the 2D logo to the multilingual laurel leaves. In 1999/00, the team got rid of the black 2D jersey in favour of the jersey that features graphable curves.</span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj0wA95zTeTQgnFu_FbUNGsKqGon__I7-nZEJSLeXTCQOw69vN0j0b014YpL2f7o5JYoTvp5_khVL4DU09p7n_e4yH-SgNX9U1AuEE32WI-_UrTPlNU2MP93Ge6kXhW74_vMS-fi-9BNxmd/s1600/Screen+Shot+2017-11-14+at+4.14.34+PM.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="194" data-original-width="414" height="149" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj0wA95zTeTQgnFu_FbUNGsKqGon__I7-nZEJSLeXTCQOw69vN0j0b014YpL2f7o5JYoTvp5_khVL4DU09p7n_e4yH-SgNX9U1AuEE32WI-_UrTPlNU2MP93Ge6kXhW74_vMS-fi-9BNxmd/s320/Screen+Shot+2017-11-14+at+4.14.34+PM.png" width="320" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><b><u>Senagoth Phase 2 (2000-2007)</u></b></span></div>
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<a href="http://www.nhluniforms.com/Senators/Images/Senators09.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><img border="0" src="http://www.nhluniforms.com/Senators/Images/Senators09.png" data-original-height="660" data-original-width="480" height="320" width="232" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-kerning: none;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-kerning: none;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;">Things get even wilder for the Sens as they introduce Ottawa’s first bike sharrows encouraging cyclists to take the full lane on both the arms and waist of these jerseys. This set was used all the way up until the Reebok Edge program took over. While this jersey set really strays far from God’s plan for all of us, it is associated with some of the most successful times for the organization. Despite this success, my favourite moment involving the black arrow jersey is <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e6LNIBkU1wU">Denis Hamel getting absolutely tossed by Phaneuf</a>.</span></span><br />
<span style="font-kerning: none;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;"><u><b>Reebok Edge (2007-2008)</b></u></span><br />
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<a href="http://www.nhluniforms.com/Senators/Images/Senators12.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><img border="0" src="http://www.nhluniforms.com/Senators/Images/Senators12.png" data-original-height="450" data-original-width="480" height="300" width="320" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;">The early 2000s jersey set was updated in 2007 after the Reebok Edge jersey program was implemented. Like the current Adidas situation in 2017, third jerseys were deemed illegal prior to the 2007 season. I remember these being unveiled right after the Cup final run and something like 14,000 people went to CTC to check these out. The centurion head got updated to look more like Chris Neil and then was slapped on a template that was shared with the Pittsburgh Penguins. This logo looks like he could toss hands while the old logo looked like he could only toss feelings. The highlight of the 2007/08 season is probably the infamous Sens Gladiator. The off ice issues were also cool.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-kerning: none;"></span><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-kerning: none;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;"><u><b>SENS (2008-2011)</b></u></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><a href="http://www.nhluniforms.com/Senators/Images/Senators14.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><img border="0" src="http://www.nhluniforms.com/Senators/Images/Senators14.png" data-original-height="675" data-original-width="480" height="320" width="227" /></a></span></div>
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<span style="font-kerning: none;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;">Every joke about this jersey has already been made but did you know that Binghamton used this template for both of their jerseys up until last year? <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BH6ibXkMKLw">Matt Duchene scored against Pascal Leclaire in this jersey</a> (check out those empty seats @ attendance Twitter). </span></span><br />
<span style="font-kerning: none;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<span style="font-kerning: none;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;"><b><u>Heritage 1.0 (2011-2017)</u></b></span></span><br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://static.squarespace.com/static/5007b2ea84aef6ab9cd08134/52de001ae4b0702987180f2c/52de0032e4b070298719198f/1317507922096/1000w/1001-ott-unveilgroup.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="320" data-original-width="720" height="142" src="https://static.squarespace.com/static/5007b2ea84aef6ab9cd08134/52de001ae4b0702987180f2c/52de0032e4b070298719198f/1317507922096/1000w/1001-ott-unveilgroup.jpg" width="320" /></span></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">Jersey unveil attendance numbers way down from 2007</span></td></tr>
</tbody></table>
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: initial; font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;">To celebrate their 20th anniversary, the Sens gave us what is possibly their best jersey of all time. These jerseys made their debut in a 7-1 loss to the Colorado Avalanche (also featuring a Duchene goal, see video above). I generally think about this jersey as being a very recent design but this jersey came out before Kyle </span><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;">Turris was on the team. Filip Kuba was on the team when these were unveiled.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-kerning: none;"></span><br /></span></div>
<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;"><b><u>Heritage 2.0 (2014)</u></b></span><br />
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<a href="http://wpmedia.o.canada.com/2014/03/hkn_senators_canucks_hockey_20140302_30814135.jpg?w=620" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><img border="0" src="http://wpmedia.o.canada.com/2014/03/hkn_senators_canucks_hockey_20140302_30814135.jpg?w=620" data-original-height="378" data-original-width="620" height="195" width="320" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="-webkit-font-kerning: none;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: initial;">The Sens made a white version of their Heritage jersey prompting frequently explanations of the difference between “Heritage jersey” and “Heritage Classic jersey”. I </span>remember<span style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: initial;"> </span>absolutely<span style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: initial;"> nothing notable about the actual Heritage Classic but I remember blowing 3 goal leads to the Habs twice in the span of weeks in these jerseys</span>. </span></span><br />
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<span style="-webkit-font-kerning: none;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;"><u><b>Heritage 3.0/ Post-Heritage (2017)</b></u></span></span><br />
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<a href="https://pbs.twimg.com/media/DOn2DXmXcAIp3ky.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="800" data-original-width="800" height="320" src="https://pbs.twimg.com/media/DOn2DXmXcAIp3ky.jpg" width="320" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="-webkit-text-stroke-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); -webkit-text-stroke-width: initial; font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;">We’ve now arrived at the post-Heritage era of Senators jerseys. This jersey rejects the traditional elements of what was once a heritage jersey. While this is not necessarily a bad thing, it represents a significant societal shift in what we consider to be heritage. At the height of the gold and laurel leaves, who would have thought that the Senators would one day incorporate silver into their jersey?</span></div>
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<span style="-webkit-text-stroke-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); -webkit-text-stroke-width: initial; font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;">Anyways, thanks for reading. </span></div>
<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11193892050631815904noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3215166191677390707.post-27091740858738518972017-05-02T08:00:00.000-04:002017-05-02T08:00:22.986-04:00The Best and Worst Excuses for Ottawa's Poor Attendance<h4>
by Rob Poirier <a href="https://twitter.com/robfeature" target="_blank">(@RobFeature)</a></h4>
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Last week, the Ottawa Senators opened their second-round playoff series at home, squaring off against the New York Rangers on a summery Thursday evening. You couldn't ask for better circumstances in which to cultivate playoff madness. Unfortunately, no one cared.<br />
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The Senators, led by Erik Karlsson, stunned the Rangers and jumped out to a 1-0 series lead in front of a crowd of just 16,744. For a building that can hold 20,000 or more when stuffed to its limit, that's not good.<br />
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But <i>why</i>? Why, God, why?? Why did this happen?! Well, for every empty seat there was in the building, you can find about ten think pieces on the internet that all attempt to answer that question. And I bravely stared into that heaping mound of trash and, through clenched teeth, grunted: "<i>One. More.</i>"<br />
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So, without further ado, here is the definitive list of the very best and very worst excuses for Ottawa's attendance woes.<br />
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<b><u>#3 WORST EXCUSE: ARENA LOCATION</u></b><br />
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I don't think anyone has ever brought this up before, but did you know that the Senators play in a building that is far removed from downtown?? That's right, people actually have to <i>drive</i> there! And once they do, they have to pay a premium to contend with what is pretty much the world's worst parking lot. It's a hassle that many fans simply aren't willing to endure more than a handful of times each year. But does that make it a good excuse?</div>
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Well, no, obviously. It says right there that it's the #3 <i>worst </i>excuse, pay attention.</div>
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How do I know it's a bad excuse? Because a second-round playoff game would never fail to sell out in a REAL hockey city, like, say... Toronto, for example. Long drives and horrible parking lots be damned.</div>
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I mean, I guess we have no way of <i>actually</i> knowing if this is true... because their rink is practically right in the center of their downtown core, and they haven't actually made it to the second-round since before I was born... but I've just got this feeling that it wouldn't happen there. It just feels right to say, true or not, and if that's good enough for literally the entire Toronto media and fanbase, then it's good enough for me.</div>
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<b><u>#3 BEST EXCUSE: MELNYK</u></b><br />
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In Ottawa, the owner of the Senators, Eugene Melnyk, is a pretty polarizing figure. For the past ten years, his hockey club has stagnated, and many fans lay the blame squarely on his shoulders. Melnyk is dogged by the perception that he is the ultimate cheapskate, and it's not hard to see why: letting his franchise player walk over a salary dispute, pulling off multiple trades that only make sense based on financials, gouging customers for their right to park in the aforementioned world's worst parking lot...</div>
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It also doesn't help that Melnyk is <i>constantly </i>on Toronto radio (where he seems to think Ottawa residents cannot hear him) complaining about how little money he is able to squeeze out of his fanbase. </div>
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If you're not going to games because you think Melnyk is a sneaky lil stinker, I feel you.</div>
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<b><u>#2 WORST EXCUSE: THE FEDS</u></b><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi7UyWOSC3HsWXQ4DOZqC9HAZkss4pDw9JYcz29TjmTWc34_9F0HFedzTIa1mfl3WQIdyAxWunJd5ebCVeTXXStF4W-veg3fhgPmMJKZL87t6whhs17mVeCU7XvSZe1SJFv9hLdCKuFBZ4/s1600/nhl68.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="298" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi7UyWOSC3HsWXQ4DOZqC9HAZkss4pDw9JYcz29TjmTWc34_9F0HFedzTIa1mfl3WQIdyAxWunJd5ebCVeTXXStF4W-veg3fhgPmMJKZL87t6whhs17mVeCU7XvSZe1SJFv9hLdCKuFBZ4/s400/nhl68.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
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In most NHL cities, large swaths of tickets are purchased by corporations, who gift these tickets as bribes to those who can help them bankrupt their competitors. It's a beautiful tradition. In Ottawa, however, the city's biggest employer is not able to do this. And that's because the city's biggest employer is The Man.</div>
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It's one thing that The Man can't give Sens tickets to sleeper agents from foreign governments who could covertly carry out lethal operations benefiting our nation, that's bad enough. But this year, The Man is also stopping The Little Guy from getting those tickets. The Little Guy, of course, being anyone who works for The Man.</div>
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Thanks to the Phoenix pay system, a significant portion of Ottawa residents are either being underpaid, or not paid at all. That's bad. But is it bad enough to be used as a viable excuse? NO!</div>
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Why? Because this is <i>exactly</i> the type of thing that could never happen in a REAL hockey city, like Toronto! Again, we can never know that for sure, because every ticket to every one of their home games is bought by corporations, leaving Leafs fans to desperately swarm to Ottawa like disease-ridden rats with their hands out... but I'm pretty sure the <i>real</i> reason it could never happen is because they won a Stanley Cup 50 years ago (not hyperbole this time, it was literally 50 years ago).</div>
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<b><u>#2 BEST EXCUSE: MUSEUM FEVER</u></b><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjPh4gskFgkY8S9HrXdS0HYXLi_7nff4qT_QvZyj5qeTLSD8DR-sXudbQiOdzuc8n_SJMylDWK-KxkLW1p1dHGL0SDBhJqu86SBluYBUTPwr8ab74sb87cqgfa0RT5pH4loNxnxWGKV0Wg/s1600/nhl69.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="207" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjPh4gskFgkY8S9HrXdS0HYXLi_7nff4qT_QvZyj5qeTLSD8DR-sXudbQiOdzuc8n_SJMylDWK-KxkLW1p1dHGL0SDBhJqu86SBluYBUTPwr8ab74sb87cqgfa0RT5pH4loNxnxWGKV0Wg/s400/nhl69.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
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If you're not from Ottawa, you could never understand the phenomenon known as Museum Fever. It starts creeping in around April. The spring breeze floats past, you lock eyes with a stranger, and both of you just know it. You've smelt it. </div>
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A priceless artifact. </div>
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"The museums," one of you shout. "They're open!"</div>
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Now, I've heard people complain that Ottawa is boring. Oh yeah? How can that be when we've got so many museums? The War Museum (old guns). The Aviation and Space Museum (old planes). The Museum of History (old everything). The Museum of Nature (old animals (dead)). The Agriculture Museum (old animals (alive)). The Museum of Science and Technology (mold). Yes, <i>mold</i>, that's SCIENCE, BABY! Even the National Art Gallery is basically a museum (old paintings). </div>
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Is it any surprise hockey can't compete?</div>
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If you're not going to games because you're going to too many museums, I feel you.</div>
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You're at a museum right now, aren't you? </div>
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Same.</div>
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<b><u>#1 WORST EXCUSE: HANDSOME JUSTIN</u></b><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEga4ukk1MpQWUPAPdIfQd5Gj77vlp2U82151tkz9LIM2NY0XMVJ5oJPGZjnobDzbXbSEQK0ZakgJclEg7n-Z7Z4MOGm0tRmkDcBazfPsxlWGr1L-1LmuwQWuMSByvdQJovJAvQyiPlTCC8/s1600/nhl70.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="306" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEga4ukk1MpQWUPAPdIfQd5Gj77vlp2U82151tkz9LIM2NY0XMVJ5oJPGZjnobDzbXbSEQK0ZakgJclEg7n-Z7Z4MOGm0tRmkDcBazfPsxlWGr1L-1LmuwQWuMSByvdQJovJAvQyiPlTCC8/s400/nhl70.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
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We established in that museum bit that Ottawa has a thing for old stuff. But what about young, <i>hot</i> stuff? Yes, we have a thing for that too.</div>
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There's a new trend that's swept Ottawa, and few people outside the city know about it. It's called... well, it's just straight up stalking Justin Trudeau (we haven't thought of a catchy name like Museum Fever yet). </div>
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That's right. Most of us can't go to hockey 'cause we're too busy trying to catch a glimpse of Handsome Justin. Like, what do you guys think he's doing right now? Probably something progressive, I bet. Or maybe he's just watching Star Wars again...</div>
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Wait, I'm getting off track, this is BAD! Don't do it!</div>
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<span style="font-size: xx-small;">I have hereby completed my court-ordered action to publicly disavow any and all activities relating to the surveillance and/or idolatry of Justin Trudeau</span></div>
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<b><u>#1 BEST EXCUSE: UNCONTROLLABLY-ESCALATING HAT BUDGETS</u></b><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjzhb2uDvZ60-zPEFrfvSZE69ImSvMlC_rsoLazMz2rpnGEE52p9MxUAXZ6cwS7nPw4FNFM5qoVtonrBBUjI_YTAXrv3UE8zcUO2ZS66xS080Da6nZKxBivIg8mrYLKEVr571SaaLN8AKo/s1600/nhl71.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjzhb2uDvZ60-zPEFrfvSZE69ImSvMlC_rsoLazMz2rpnGEE52p9MxUAXZ6cwS7nPw4FNFM5qoVtonrBBUjI_YTAXrv3UE8zcUO2ZS66xS080Da6nZKxBivIg8mrYLKEVr571SaaLN8AKo/s400/nhl71.jpeg" width="400" /></a></div>
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Another problem that is unique to Ottawa: Jean-Gabriel Pageau. The guy just won't stop scoring playoff hat tricks. Recently, he started adding an extra goal, just to be sure. It's killing us. </div>
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"Oh, don't you just throw one hat?"</div>
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Uh, yeah, maybe if some rookie scored four goals in an early season game that my crappy team went on to lose anyway. But when JGP scores a hat trick in the playoffs, humiliating a divisional rival in the process... or when he uses one to tie a game with just seconds left before winning it in double OT... you throw <i>all</i> the hats. Mine. Yours. The hat grandpa needs to keep the sun from ravaging his eczema-covered scalp. Uncle Mike's toupee. <i>All of them.</i></div>
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If you're not going to games because you're spending all your money trying to replace the hats you've thrown at JGP's feet, PLEASE HELP MY KIDS HEADS ARE BURNING UP OUT HERE</div>
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Rob Poirierhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12361226710082035401noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3215166191677390707.post-16350052693998687792017-04-21T08:00:00.000-04:002017-04-21T08:00:40.036-04:00Game 5 Preview featuring Bob Cole<h4>
by Rob Poirier <a href="https://twitter.com/robfeature" target="_blank">(@RobFeature)</a></h4>
Hi, everyone! Remember this site?? Yeah, it's been a long time. But you'll be happy to know that we are back, and we are back with a BANG! That's right, folks... I managed to pull a few strings and get my close, personal friend Bob Cole to help me out today!<br />
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Real talk for a second: these playoffs have been great fun so far. And if we're being honest with ourselves, one of the reasons for that is the sweet, grandfatherly presence of Bob Cole. Like him or not, you can't deny that no one makes you listen harder than ol' Col'.<br />
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So, without further ado, I'm going to turn things over to my best friend, who's going to highlight the five players who could make a HUGE difference in Game 5 tonight. Over to you, Bob.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh0IveHrQK1uT6MNfvsufPxRLcn3r_JAJ17EtuPNwjbZ35HbwxO2_58wU2Wds7l1Uif-ZVwvL78fQ9mnPoLHcWFUT5Y4YOECAAu1zPC1b9wKvIq4D3z149dN3Ox6IWWNI2eQzNKamXBh9I/s1600/nhl61.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="225" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh0IveHrQK1uT6MNfvsufPxRLcn3r_JAJ17EtuPNwjbZ35HbwxO2_58wU2Wds7l1Uif-ZVwvL78fQ9mnPoLHcWFUT5Y4YOECAAu1zPC1b9wKvIq4D3z149dN3Ox6IWWNI2eQzNKamXBh9I/s400/nhl61.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
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<span style="color: blue; font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">Thanks, Ron.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Actually, it's--</span><br />
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<span style="color: blue; font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">Ooh baby do we have a good one for you tonight! Nation's capital. Ottawa. A major league tilt between the Boston Broons... and the Ottawa Sens.</span><br />
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<b><u>5. ZDENO CHARA</u></b><br />
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<span style="color: blue; font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">Zdeno Chara. The captain. He can bang, alright. You know he's got the big shot, and they'll be looking for him back there. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><b><u>4</u></b></span><b style="font-family: inherit;"><u>. BOBBY RHINE</u></b><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhGFnOPkOaiVVtdu2ESkLe2ZyKP6aSmXGk-2Kdt59ho_pegjAM5Xv7t8NtUFiOq2BZES5Z-BBcvEcl8BsniySShqdS4_Me35DcwrwY2S-PFFCD1vICb-Ksy0WQctP7w2dE4BLnEgaf6Now/s1600/nhl63.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="232" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhGFnOPkOaiVVtdu2ESkLe2ZyKP6aSmXGk-2Kdt59ho_pegjAM5Xv7t8NtUFiOq2BZES5Z-BBcvEcl8BsniySShqdS4_Me35DcwrwY2S-PFFCD1vICb-Ksy0WQctP7w2dE4BLnEgaf6Now/s320/nhl63.png" width="320" /></a></div>
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<span style="color: blue; font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">Bobby Rhine. Fantastic goal-scorer. And he'll be trying to do it again tonight. Score goals. He's been putting them in for his team, and really... putting them in... all over. Bobby Rhine.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><b><u>3. THE OTTAWA GOALIE</u></b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Bob, that's Craig--</span></div>
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<span style="color: blue; font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">This fella has made some beauty stops in this series, let me tell you. He's looked great. And his Sens from Ottawa have played great in front of him. When he gets goin'... look out!</span><br />
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<b><u>5. ZDENO CHARA</u></b><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj52t8REjs5QZAoYpz-8sA7QQUuGH3oq2KsAIwr9J74-MB-zL9jyxzie84TpkzFmMXqE9k7TSk_y6iYWjSiaqvQ5gKPDyjXoiMww7E1sWQVVUL-RtzUU4TVsuagJtd2iVWTIEDe3i6mCvY/s1600/nhl62.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="232" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj52t8REjs5QZAoYpz-8sA7QQUuGH3oq2KsAIwr9J74-MB-zL9jyxzie84TpkzFmMXqE9k7TSk_y6iYWjSiaqvQ5gKPDyjXoiMww7E1sWQVVUL-RtzUU4TVsuagJtd2iVWTIEDe3i6mCvY/s320/nhl62.png" width="320" /></a></div>
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<span style="color: blue; font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">Zdeno Chara. The captain. </span><br />
<span style="color: blue; font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: inherit;">Wait, Bob--</span><br />
<span style="color: blue; font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: blue; font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">He has got that big body.</span><br />
<span style="color: blue; font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: inherit;">Bob, you already--</span><br />
<span style="color: blue; font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: blue; font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">He is going to want to get out there... on the ice... and help his team win a hockey game tonight. You bet!</span><br />
<span style="color: blue; font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;"><br /></span>
<b><u><br /></u></b>
<b><u>2. CAREY PRICE</u></b><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgv9U8tZig-JiPcIqzof4wcB_naXqjhQ91bcumaLHex14bVDKDEefgcJWt4PBiK4urVgoAvJehaA-Xw1xShF_yAVNZ4VYDpLcFRjmJmuPKWimCvs9mqe-CpKIvxADYUT_HLwY6wrqY3TwI/s1600/nhl64.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><img border="0" height="232" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgv9U8tZig-JiPcIqzof4wcB_naXqjhQ91bcumaLHex14bVDKDEefgcJWt4PBiK4urVgoAvJehaA-Xw1xShF_yAVNZ4VYDpLcFRjmJmuPKWimCvs9mqe-CpKIvxADYUT_HLwY6wrqY3TwI/s320/nhl64.png" width="320" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Bob, that's not--</span></div>
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<span style="color: blue; font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">Price has been excellent. And you can hear it now, from this sellout crowd.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Sellout crowd?</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="color: blue; font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">Great save! </span></div>
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<span style="color: blue; font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Wait, what's happening?</span><span style="color: blue; font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;"> </span></div>
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<span style="color: blue; font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">No, it's in! And the Toronto Maple Leafs have won the Stanley Cup, off the stick of Barilko!</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><b><u>1. </u></b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><b><u><br /></u></b></span></div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;">Bob?</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Bob, you wanna do number one?</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">We said there were gonna be five of these, Bob.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">. . . . . .</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
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Okay, sorry about this guys, but Bob is asleep. So, uh... well, I guess that's it...</div>
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<br /></div>
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Our thanks to Bob Cole, and Go Sens Go!</div>
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<br /></div>
Rob Poirierhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12361226710082035401noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3215166191677390707.post-84276973735610912302016-11-17T08:00:00.000-05:002016-11-17T08:00:01.631-05:00Melnyk Unveils Bizarre Plan to Boost Attendance<h4>
by Rob Poirier <a href="https://twitter.com/robfeature" target="_blank">(@RobFeature)</a></h4>
For the Ottawa Senators, the 2016-17 season is off to a pretty good start. The club holds a 10-5-1 record after sixteen games, and more importantly, seem to have finally solved their defensive woes. Case in point: in eight of their last nine games, the Sens have allowed just two goals or fewer. That's really good. What's <i>not</i> really good is that the Sens have scored just two goals or fewer in eleven of their last twelve games.<br />
<br />
<i><b>NOTE: </b>This statistic does not acknowledge goals scored in the shootout, and neither should you.</i><br />
<br />
The lack of production from the Senators' offence is concerning. But what is <i>more </i>concerning, is the Senators' off-ice woes...<br />
<br />
After nine home games this season, the Ottawa Senators are on pace to record their lowest attendance figures in <a href="http://www.hockeydb.com/nhl-attendance/att_graph.php?tmi=7328">TWENTY YEARS.</a> To put that into perspective, here's some cool facts about the 1995-96 Ottawa Senators:<br />
<br />
- they played a portion of their season at the Civic Centre<br />
- Randy Cunneyworth was their Captain<br />
- the Hartford Whalers were in their division<br />
- Chris Phillips hadn't even been born yet<br />
<br />
So why <i>are</i> the numbers so low? Some speculate that fans are waiting for the Senators to move downtown (we're only about six years away). Others think that there are simply too many other good options for their entertainment dollar, like museums that feature old farm equipment. And yet, still more people seem to believe that Senators fans are just plain sick and tired of a team that never has any ambition beyond sneaking into the playoffs via a wild card spot. A team that routinely promises sweeping changes, but never, ever delivers. A team that offers no evidence at all of a vision for the future.<br />
<br />
But, I mean, who knows? These scenarios are each equally plausible, right??<br />
<br />
One thing is for sure: because they are a <strike>team that exists solely as a source of income for its owner</strike> budget team, the Ottawa Senators are going to have to do something about this, and fast. And they know it. On Tuesday, Sens owner Eugene Melnyk went on one of his trademark <a href="http://ottawacitizen.com/opinion/columnists/eugene-melnyk-responds-to-the-citizen-ottawa-senators-fought-hard-for-an-nhl-game-on-the-hill">'make everything worse' rants</a>.<br />
<br />
"Look," his letter began. "For the outdoor game, I proposed something highly illogical, logistically impossible, and borderline illegal. And they had the audacity to say no! To <i>me</i>! So what am I supposed to do? Give the long-suffering fans of this team an event like they've never seen before, but use someone else's facility to do it, meaning I don't get a full 100% of the profits?? NEVER IN YOUR DAMN LIFE!!"<br />
<br />
He then went on to address the attendance concerns.<br />
<br />
"I mean, yes, this team has been bad for the last ten years... BUT, they've also been good for the past ten <i>days</i>! And <i>still</i> nobody is coming?? Now, some say that they can't keep winning this way... that scoring just one or two goals and relying on world-class goaltending is not sustainable... well, to them I say: 'wouldja just shaddup and gimme your money already!?'"<br />
<br />
In the midst of his complaining, Melnyk paused to assure folks that the attendance woes would not continue, because he himself had concocted a foolproof plan.<br />
<br />
"There is <i>one</i> bright spot on the calendar. <i>One</i> game that the cheapskates in this awful town have actually bought tickets for. So, with that in mind, I am pleased to announce that, starting this Thursday night, and at every single home game for the rest of the year, we will be honoring Daniel Alfredsson by raising his number 11 to the rafters!"<br />
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiUZqwvurGi4ynbXGmSqrQgnq8ZITLmNUmiWNjGr1L9ftLGRSWznQibJDa3XqW4-nmFIkOdC5f99mzQK8__VEHjVLdT4ilO7RzkoerVnHePogIzaxGmpfVE71zSaxEEUpYLijQpCehYAy8/s1600/nhl61.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="275" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiUZqwvurGi4ynbXGmSqrQgnq8ZITLmNUmiWNjGr1L9ftLGRSWznQibJDa3XqW4-nmFIkOdC5f99mzQK8__VEHjVLdT4ilO7RzkoerVnHePogIzaxGmpfVE71zSaxEEUpYLijQpCehYAy8/s640/nhl61.png" width="640" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://twitter.com/capital_gains65">@Capital_Gains65</a></td></tr>
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"So if you want to be there for one of these historic, once-in-a-lifetime events, TOUGH" he wrote, "Because you'll have to commit to attending several. That's right! Tickets are only available as part of a multi-game package! But hey! If you show up to the games early enough, you'll get a chance to see some random kid who volunteered to sing the anthem for free, so there's always that!"<br />
<br />
"That oughta do it," Melnyk's letter concludes. "Those ingrates always did like that greedy little-- hachi machi, I'm still writing!? What gives??"<br />
<br />Rob Poirierhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12361226710082035401noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3215166191677390707.post-58282261250994082692016-11-16T07:17:00.001-05:002016-11-16T10:06:38.709-05:00Ottawa fans mired in despair and angst as team sets 100+ point pace<h4>
by Joe Boughner (<a href="http://www.twitter.com/mcllwainsworld" target="_blank">@McLlwainsWorld</a>)</h4>
A vortex of despair and angst has settled over the Senators' fan base in recent weeks as their hockey heroes have stormed out of the gate to a surprising 10-5-1 record in their first 16 games, good enough for second place in the Atlantic Division.<br />
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<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: right; margin-left: 1em; text-align: right;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiSJSmLyYs1jym2OfYjy23vsNhIfvKiGGgqbkS-1VZfNDO5qNa5V2D5MEqU4Cq6rftMnNMxkYRTrImeH8qfltv2Sj70Bc-4wqxYYCPFvi4UsIWZcQ0Ol31f85BySA1-YBCz4losaos25n4/s1600/CxWijmzWQAAJCTW.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="225" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiSJSmLyYs1jym2OfYjy23vsNhIfvKiGGgqbkS-1VZfNDO5qNa5V2D5MEqU4Cq6rftMnNMxkYRTrImeH8qfltv2Sj70Bc-4wqxYYCPFvi4UsIWZcQ0Ol31f85BySA1-YBCz4losaos25n4/s400/CxWijmzWQAAJCTW.jpg" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><div style="font-size: 12.8px;">
The Senators bravely huddle on the ice in Philadelphia to discuss</div>
<div style="font-size: 12.8px;">
what went wrong in their OT win over the Flyers.</div>
<div style="font-size: 12.8px;">
PS. We stole this photo from the<a href="https://twitter.com/Senators/status/798723249488138240" target="_blank"> Senators' Twitter feed</a>.</div>
<div style="font-size: 12.8px;">
Please don't sue us, guys.</div>
<div style="font-size: 12.8px;">
<3 <3 <3</div>
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"I can barely stand to watch," tweeted one fan as the Senators rallied late to force OT and eventually win on the road in Philadelphia Tuesday night. "This team is so .... blah."<br />
<br />
The Senators have managed at least a point in each of their last four games, including a surprising win over the perennial powerhouse Los Angeles Kings.<br />
<br />
"They need to pull the trigger on a few deals, this roster desperately needs a shake up," commented one fan in response to another victory <strike>Vine</strike> <strike>gif</strike> video on the Sens' official Facebook page. "No wonder people aren't buying tickets to watch these lacklustre efforts!"<br />
<br />
The forboding blackness of eternal sorrow is most palpable at the Canadian Tire Centre, where poor attendance has been the norm during a home-heavy November schedule. The team's record in their own rink is 6-2-1.<br />
<br />
"Look, maybe if they string a few wins together I'll pony up for some stubs," mused one post-game show caller. "But they gotta show me they're committed to actually winning."<br />
<br />
Like a Poe verse come to life, the best years of Erik Karlsson's career are ticking away while the Senators are on pace for 107 points.<br />
<br />
The Florida Panthers won the division in 2015-16 with 103 points.
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10091792586496638962noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3215166191677390707.post-5424806485859259072016-10-31T08:00:00.000-04:002016-10-31T08:00:04.552-04:00Photoshop Battle #1: Spooky, Scary, Sparty?Every few weeks, Capital Gains and Matty Gervais will be throwing down in a one-on-one Photoshop Battle based on reader suggestions.<br />
<br />
The first Photoshop Battle of the season is now underway, and given the date, it has a Halloween twist to it. At the end of this post there's a link to a poll where you'll be able to vote for this week's winner.<br />
<br />
Let's go!<br />
<br />
<h3>
Stranger Things </h3>
Thanks to <a href="https://twitter.com/Victory4201/status/788539746582728704">@Victory4201</a> for the suggestion.<br />
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<h4>
Daniel "Eleven" Alfredsson </h4>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi3uHlUwxwrBjjHKe3qkAB6qt_3qKIYe3QpJdIbXpRU0nD39Yay0jqdzYkVpZ8ybXbqQmFhEFWdMdNIclVfQpg16Wn6vTirhAhPeMqj1OVq_Zq86prX9NbGA2GG5zJm1EjJxzJoKtkeMJE/s640/alfie+eleven.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="427" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi3uHlUwxwrBjjHKe3qkAB6qt_3qKIYe3QpJdIbXpRU0nD39Yay0jqdzYkVpZ8ybXbqQmFhEFWdMdNIclVfQpg16Wn6vTirhAhPeMqj1OVq_Zq86prX9NbGA2GG5zJm1EjJxzJoKtkeMJE/s640/alfie+eleven.jpg" width="640" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">It only makes sense for Alfie to dress as Eleven</td></tr>
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<h4>
<br />
Dustin Stone </h4>
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi2qGv2FCL6IVO2yub-Yp-dlUICe7kiThs6gOc-SRcQH8XgX-ED_iYe3CEU-fyklACPlBwJfqiWtr1Aq-Y_KGhYdV_LEtnZYKKJtaADDu1KqEGmiX7YSzp3XEtsKln-43-eptkHcKQ6AWA/s1600/stone+stranger+things.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi2qGv2FCL6IVO2yub-Yp-dlUICe7kiThs6gOc-SRcQH8XgX-ED_iYe3CEU-fyklACPlBwJfqiWtr1Aq-Y_KGhYdV_LEtnZYKKJtaADDu1KqEGmiX7YSzp3XEtsKln-43-eptkHcKQ6AWA/s640/stone+stranger+things.jpg" width="577" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">After he's done stealing pucks he can steal some teeth</td></tr>
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<br />
<h3>
PG-13 </h3>
<h4>
Gru Boucher with his Minion Tom Pyatt</h4>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj0vm4vUcymYiB7MzN5Ys31G6Bl89BBmxPm9Xu3MnD0a0eumoyk4lzJpaojQF4T4i16ib1-CAfnZERpqgMSz0-CLCjLbb9YXJWkdiSR5iDyPj0Q02_rvEm6ZMpe8RcS6t7Qku964yvzTn0/s1600/boucher+minion.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="468" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj0vm4vUcymYiB7MzN5Ys31G6Bl89BBmxPm9Xu3MnD0a0eumoyk4lzJpaojQF4T4i16ib1-CAfnZERpqgMSz0-CLCjLbb9YXJWkdiSR5iDyPj0Q02_rvEm6ZMpe8RcS6t7Qku964yvzTn0/s1600/boucher+minion.jpg" width="640" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"></td></tr>
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<h4>
Dzingle the Delivery Man</h4>
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhvKhDQn13yYllmbFLLVfONmOLiimjnv8zg894V4KL2kVplOj8Ww_j93AQFKGrAdGeN3l-6T6oNYvwMuH7RWVG2rVOQr8CZ9Yq0rB3eCRLOP4ytiq1h2MXgvQE_D-noD7LgIwBcgi0Fcpk/s1600/Dzingel+UPS.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhvKhDQn13yYllmbFLLVfONmOLiimjnv8zg894V4KL2kVplOj8Ww_j93AQFKGrAdGeN3l-6T6oNYvwMuH7RWVG2rVOQr8CZ9Yq0rB3eCRLOP4ytiq1h2MXgvQE_D-noD7LgIwBcgi0Fcpk/s640/Dzingel+UPS.jpg" width="454" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Dzingel's been delivering it all season</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />
<h3>
14-A </h3>
Thanks to <a href="https://twitter.com/bonksmullet">@BonksMullet</a> for the suggestion.
<br />
<br />
<h4>
Sexy Sparty</h4>
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiE8x1eNzd_eH8rNMNQD0nTpdwvacgGyPnVc1Z43CfsRhEi5eEBHs0Mv5_IG7rJj67UXOvV4IDn2Jztc-2MPSKfpu2YbOCRZDWp0krUWFXvjFr_dSSDtxGH2aKEJxxBDY9lKFjrU1K6n5c/s640/sexy+spart.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="488" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiE8x1eNzd_eH8rNMNQD0nTpdwvacgGyPnVc1Z43CfsRhEi5eEBHs0Mv5_IG7rJj67UXOvV4IDn2Jztc-2MPSKfpu2YbOCRZDWp0krUWFXvjFr_dSSDtxGH2aKEJxxBDY9lKFjrU1K6n5c/s640/sexy+spart.jpg" width="640" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">A sexy costume you'd like to unsee</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />
<h4>
Sexy Borowiecki</h4>
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi-W1FAkanUnEscQoM-1hXxp8vNewIquLHoEk_ol-1ovTYkF1n9E5xByO-mG42ELPKvFU70UJr-w9U8OPCblHm0KYsaf0vTCLCwK29MQHmi1lRdZ4RB3hQql-tyJX638GTsI0eEc0QeKro/s1600/boro+spartan+ctc.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi-W1FAkanUnEscQoM-1hXxp8vNewIquLHoEk_ol-1ovTYkF1n9E5xByO-mG42ELPKvFU70UJr-w9U8OPCblHm0KYsaf0vTCLCwK29MQHmi1lRdZ4RB3hQql-tyJX638GTsI0eEc0QeKro/s640/boro+spartan+ctc.jpg" width="595" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Boro sticking true to his #brand</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />
<h3>
Classic Horror Films </h3>
<h4>
Michael "Melnyk" Myers</h4>
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj_CqJyw_I-vXcGQ1i_ZfDlc6weW99AMNWwWSMoaWW_N61pL0m0wOCIny9nwhVEt7BUTXQ-dx5A_JRs4Pj5oLgRCYJxeZuDsjA-qL8kmxaKZ9uWVQ85sRf1leLmLeY8COBU_8ILkuLm97k/s640/melnyk+myers.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj_CqJyw_I-vXcGQ1i_ZfDlc6weW99AMNWwWSMoaWW_N61pL0m0wOCIny9nwhVEt7BUTXQ-dx5A_JRs4Pj5oLgRCYJxeZuDsjA-qL8kmxaKZ9uWVQ85sRf1leLmLeY8COBU_8ILkuLm97k/s640/melnyk+myers.jpg" width="640" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">The only thing Eugene will slashing this year is the team budget.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />
<h4>
Widey Krueger</h4>
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjC4zaaN3Hb0GtjGmiDCxTF1moVUNJsqYLOHrMj-7kPqAdb1T4grcGhlLNbAYG3oGKXatiPJofjR7ydiW4YBp0OqDMyRRjaYCg2funMova3BjJnZISAabTmvS85PILQ0VGbh8vZAuM8-7M/s1600/wideman+freddy.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjC4zaaN3Hb0GtjGmiDCxTF1moVUNJsqYLOHrMj-7kPqAdb1T4grcGhlLNbAYG3oGKXatiPJofjR7ydiW4YBp0OqDMyRRjaYCg2funMova3BjJnZISAabTmvS85PILQ0VGbh8vZAuM8-7M/s640/wideman+freddy.jpg" width="616" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">1, 2 Widey's coming for you</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
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<h3>
Other </h3>
<h4>
Curtis the Clown</h4>
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEji0fjldjVOqysicyXIl40EEuhdRcGTPyRn4VupJuh8oRg1ghnCbUQAta5E6w27VAd1k5znIjARw7nxeOoQskCJ7wKxI3x8b7gLtf8S_VyHeZjSmlh9Yj3d1Gjoci_Mdmp_oPYQjHjdjZc/s640/lazar+clown.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="363" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEji0fjldjVOqysicyXIl40EEuhdRcGTPyRn4VupJuh8oRg1ghnCbUQAta5E6w27VAd1k5znIjARw7nxeOoQskCJ7wKxI3x8b7gLtf8S_VyHeZjSmlh9Yj3d1Gjoci_Mdmp_oPYQjHjdjZc/s640/lazar+clown.jpg" width="640" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Lazar "trying" to be a scary clown</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />
<h4>
Methot the Werewolf</h4>
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg4rZCRbk_3SjUSl44FCXQ1r_a7l9a0_17eLYRCvBu_SNM4c76reCJvvjS6UTt9T9CAyOpvGOkucQBZr6wQ2cU-P22lLBmiw-5IQvwfOqaRXkEC40QCgD3rCdC1uy7-8CBUOUaxOPhhSS8/s1600/methot+werewolf.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg4rZCRbk_3SjUSl44FCXQ1r_a7l9a0_17eLYRCvBu_SNM4c76reCJvvjS6UTt9T9CAyOpvGOkucQBZr6wQ2cU-P22lLBmiw-5IQvwfOqaRXkEC40QCgD3rCdC1uy7-8CBUOUaxOPhhSS8/s640/methot+werewolf.jpg" width="640" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">At least this explains why he's always shirtless</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />
<h3>
End of Round One </h3>
This concludes the inaugural Photoshop Battle. Please be sure to vote for your favourites by <a href="https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLScG0Dyo5bR9-bAz4vcsLG_2VBPtVDUqOEPdUUX6HMPwq8awAQ/viewform">clicking here</a> and filling out the form. Happy Halloween!Capital Gainshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10680384558914871834noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3215166191677390707.post-50582888125540593352016-10-18T08:00:00.000-04:002016-11-07T12:52:10.050-05:00Gainsy vs. Matty - Photoshop Battle PreviewA common theme for 2016 has been the idea of two heroes battling for supremacy. We've seen Batman clash with Superman. Captain America go toe to toe with Iron Man. The Auston Matthews™ vs. Erik Karlsson. Team Europe vs. Team Canada.
<br />
<br />
And now, we'll get to see <a href="https://twitter.com/Capital_Gains65">Gainsy</a> vs. <a href="https://twitter.com/Gerv_Rebrand">Matty</a>, Mano a Mano in a series of Photoshop Battles. Yes, that's Battles with an 's' which means there's going to be more than 1 since neither one of us has a mother named Martha.
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<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi2u8Mj5oTGxcWgoBiRiqcRDR8ILVEQSoKLz_wx3e1lsmg9ZN4rq22OWoD_AdcW0d8RK1x-N5cAbY8pFF7M2oTMrcwgPJkL2q8Y4PjuF6zwpWxLoRVfmnsGGcVbG0xqf1__vt9L2NPxvsM/s1600/photoshop+battle.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi2u8Mj5oTGxcWgoBiRiqcRDR8ILVEQSoKLz_wx3e1lsmg9ZN4rq22OWoD_AdcW0d8RK1x-N5cAbY8pFF7M2oTMrcwgPJkL2q8Y4PjuF6zwpWxLoRVfmnsGGcVbG0xqf1__vt9L2NPxvsM/s1600/photoshop+battle.jpg" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">We're looking for sponsors.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<h3>
The Goal
</h3>
Find out who the better Photoshopper is.
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<br />
<h3>
The Judges
</h3>
<strike>Simon, Randy and Paula.</strike> You.
<br />
<br />
<h3>
What Will Be Judged
</h3>
Over the course of the season, in a series of posts, we'll be taking photoshop suggestions from you and making them. Each post will consist of 3-5 mini-battles in which you'll have the option to pick a winner for each. The overall winner for the week will be revealed in the following week's post. Although there will be no official schedule for posting, it's likely that these will be a bi-weekly feature.
<br />
<br />
Using the hashtag <b>#GAINSYvsMATTY</b> on Twitter or <a href="https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSfynqYsiN89twNp62_p0XWCGFE2mzDpYaVand0A9mC8ekVajA/viewform">by filling out this form</a>, you can send in suggestions for what you want to see made in Photoshop, Sens related, for now. The form/hashtag will be observed on a daily basis, so feel to send in ideas whenever you want.
<br />
<br />
When thinking of suggestions, we'd recommend taking a Mad Libs approach to it. Name a location, an adjective, a verb, etc. <b>The more freedom the photoshoppers have, the better.</b> That, however, doesn't mean suggestions as specific as <i>"Curtis Lazar with red braces on the carousel in Central Park on a snowy Saturday in December"</i> or as open-ended as <i>"One of the players outside"</i> aren't acceptable. We might not use them, but you can still suggest it.
<br />
<br />
<h3>
<a href="http://www.bonksmullet.com/2016/10/photoshop-battle-1-spooky-scary-sparty.html">Battle #1: Spooky, Scary, Sparty?</a>
</h3>
<h3>
Battle #2
</h3>
We are no longer looking specifically for Halloween themed suggestions. Anything will do. Thanks!
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<br />
<h3>
Questions
</h3>
If you have any questions, drop a comment below (yeah, there's a comment section on this site) or send me (@Capital_Gains65) a tweet, and I'll do my best to answer it within 7-10 business days.
Capital Gainshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10680384558914871834noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3215166191677390707.post-41935281640192816592016-10-17T09:01:00.000-04:002016-10-17T09:01:24.190-04:00Sens Right Now 004 - New Additions<h4>
by Mike Wheeler (<a href="https://twitter.com/TheMikeWheeler" target="_blank">@theMikeWheeler</a>)</h4>
<br />
We've got a hot season preview (?) coming right at ya this week on <i>Sens Right Now</i>!<br />
<br />
<br />
<iframe allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="315" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/xhXf4ktonVA" width="560"></iframe>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00961196745632622251noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3215166191677390707.post-70400270476503128322016-10-15T14:02:00.001-04:002016-10-15T14:02:44.051-04:00bRian5or6 Road Trip Editionwent on a road trip to Montreal to see the Sens. worst idea of my life.<br />
<br />
<br />
<style>.embed-container { position: relative; padding-bottom: 56.25%; height: 0; overflow: hidden; max-width: 100%; } .embed-container iframe, .embed-container object, .embed-container embed { position: absolute; top: 0; left: 0; width: 100%; height: 100%; }</style><div class='embed-container'><iframe src='https://www.youtube.com/embed/3IULqiuGdWs' frameborder='0' allowfullscreen></iframe></div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13771090264216823102noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3215166191677390707.post-57627876245315130412016-10-12T08:00:00.000-04:002016-10-12T11:52:09.382-04:00Major Networks Announce Auston Matthews Programming for 2016-17 Season<h4>
by Rob Poirier <a href="https://twitter.com/robfeature" target="_blank">(@RobFeature)</a></h4>
The Ottawa Senators will begin the 2016-17 season at home tonight, where they'll play host to their arch-rivals, the Toronto Maple Leafs. And while it's expected to be business as usual within the arena, fans watching at home are sure to notice something very different about this year's broadcasts.<br>
<br>
You see, after winning the NHL's draft lottery earlier in the summer, the Toronto Maple Leafs stepped up to the podium on June 24th and used the first overall pick to draft Arizona-native Auston Matthews. Since the draft, the Maple Leafs' fan base has been rabidly sniffing out every scrap of available news relating to their would-be saviour. They want all Matthews, all the time. And broadcasters are scrambling to ensure that that's what they'll get.<br>
<a href="http://www.bonksmullet.com/2016/10/austin-matthews-programming.html#more">Read the entire post »</a>Rob Poirierhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12361226710082035401noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3215166191677390707.post-82840774138453241562016-10-04T08:00:00.000-04:002016-10-04T13:07:46.783-04:00Get to Know Phil Varone<h4>
by Joe Boughner (<a href="http://www.twitter.com/mcllwainsworld" target="_blank">@McLlwainsWorld</a>)</h4>
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Almost every year in every NHL training camp, some unheralded depth guy puts on enough of a show to get fans talking in excited tones before eventually coming back down to earth and disappearing from our collective memory. In Ottawa, such a player is often said to be "pulling a Bochenski" and this year nobody has Bochenski'd harder than Phil "The Thrill" Varone.<br />
<br />
From fans in the upper decks <a href="https://twitter.com/McLlwainsWorld/status/780530427631140864" target="_blank">singing his praises to the tune of the creepy-as-all-hell-in-retrospect Knack hit My Sharona</a>, to other tweets that suggested he is pretty okay at hockey, the pride of Vaughan, Ontario, is all the rage in Sensland.<br />
<br />
But who is Phil Varone? We <strike>sat down with the upstart sniper</strike> Googled him and then took artistic liberties with whatever came up to bring you this Very Special Feature.<br />
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<SoftAcousticGuitarMusic.wav><br />
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<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: right; margin-left: 1em; text-align: right;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhf1zABTN5yxWloPRk4fwbZZrlC4ZGDvCqRfyXO2l0DU1vygmB5wDQRLoAQRGspWaFMZyRlQ6NWemvqwWlbBBcRbw4MzgTubFb-BTLbTUsNHQ1gaPffT7SMe9Iuh1aT0XrfU0byHXnYGTs/s1600/packsack.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhf1zABTN5yxWloPRk4fwbZZrlC4ZGDvCqRfyXO2l0DU1vygmB5wDQRLoAQRGspWaFMZyRlQ6NWemvqwWlbBBcRbw4MzgTubFb-BTLbTUsNHQ1gaPffT7SMe9Iuh1aT0XrfU0byHXnYGTs/s200/packsack.jpg" width="200" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Give him some slack, Jack.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
Phil Varone was born in Vaughan, Ontario, eldest son of Phillipe "Ol' Pep" Verone, a sheet metal worker whose own dreams of sports stardom faded away after an unfortunate plumbing accident as a teen left him unable to give more than 87% to any given task.<br />
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"I'd always wanted to make it to the big leagues in competitive darts," explained the elder Varone. "But that requires 110% effort at least 75-80% of the time. I didn't have it in me."<br />
<br />
Forced to carry the dreams of his father in a tattered knapsack, young Phil Varone learned early on the value of hard work, often getting up at the crack of dawn to feed the family chickens before heading off to school on his second-hand bike, the banana seat cracked and worn so many a tattered knapsack.<br />
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<SlightlyMelancholyPianoMusicInAMinorKey.wav><br />
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But the temptations of high school life nearly ended the Varones' shared dreams of stardom.<br />
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<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: right; text-align: right;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgveyvz5nipjsliL082EaCuqy-Lf7Blxd89_JMoGIjB9Ag-IvFEO3zDIM_ueixlMlkUU3VCd4qKXL5TpAQhPi3ePfnlc4NL-k5_zrnXa7WKpzrUdjw-l_s6GSqxSOldsgb4DnRrxX2zeDI/s1600/hkMBAoc6.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgveyvz5nipjsliL082EaCuqy-Lf7Blxd89_JMoGIjB9Ag-IvFEO3zDIM_ueixlMlkUU3VCd4qKXL5TpAQhPi3ePfnlc4NL-k5_zrnXa7WKpzrUdjw-l_s6GSqxSOldsgb4DnRrxX2zeDI/s400/hkMBAoc6.jpg" width="288" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">It's funny because he has the same name as a drummer.<br />
That's the joke.<br />
Photo by <a href="https://twitter.com/Gerv_Rebrand" target="_blank">MattyGoSens</a>.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
"Philly started hanging with a rough crowd," lamented his mother Maria. "Getting into heavy metal music and partying and stuff... it was upsetting."<br />
<br />
Varone ended up taking up the drums and going on tour with his band Saigon Kick in 1988 somehow despite being born in 1990 (<span style="color: red;">Editor: </span><span style="color: red;">Joe, this can't be right. Are you sure this is the same dude?</span>). This led to <a href="http://www.blabbermouth.net/news/saigon-kickex-skid-row-drummer-phil-varone-talks-to-sro-magazine-inc-audio/" target="_blank">further stints with Skid Row and Mötley Crüe's Vince Neil</a> and the crazy lifestyle that often comes along with such a crowd.<br />
<br />
Eventually, he began to be known more for his <a href="http://www.vice.com/en_ca/read/phil-varone-swinger-interview-566" target="_blank">NSFW hobbies</a> than for his silky mitts on the hockey rink.<br />
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<MusicDrops><br />
<br />
That's when fate intervened.<br />
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<UpliftingPianoBallad.wav><br />
<br />
"I think it's fair to say the Murrays saved my life," mused Varone from his Ottawa hotel room.<br />
<br />
"Living in Rochester, doing swinger porn and trying to reboot my drumming career, it was toxic, man."<br />
<br />
That's when Tim Murray and his Uncle Brian engineered The Trade (TM).<br />
<br />
"The Senators organization is the furthest thing away from a life of hard partying and heavy metal," explained Varone. "It was like finding the fountain of youth and also a fountain that makes you good at hockey."<br />
<br />
Living out of a suitcase in a suburban Kanata hotel room has given Phil Varone a new outlook on life and a new chance to honour his father's legacy.<br />
<br />
"Whether I end up here or I move into the Fairfield Inn near the Cracker Barrel in Bingo, I really feel like I've turned a corner. I'm no longer Phil Varone, 48-year-old drummer-turned-porn-star. I'm Phil Varone, 25-year-old fringe NHL'er who is Bochensking hard and living the pre-season dream."<br />
<br />
"You couldn't make this up if you tried."Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10091792586496638962noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3215166191677390707.post-9464368800335835862016-09-28T07:59:00.000-04:002016-09-28T07:59:00.213-04:00Brassard Determined to Replace Zibanejad - On and Off the Ice<h4>
by Rob Poirier <a href="https://twitter.com/robfeature" target="_blank">(@RobFeature)</a></h4>
<br>
On July 18th, the Ottawa Senators <a href="http://www.tsn.ca/sens-acquire-brassard-for-zibanejad-1.528574">traded Mika Zibanejad</a> to the New York Rangers in exchange for center Derick Brassard. The move was meant to signify that, after a string of disappointing seasons, the Senators were serious about returning to their winning ways.<br>
<a href="http://www.bonksmullet.com/2016/09/brassard-replace-zibanejad.html#more">Read the entire post »</a>Rob Poirierhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12361226710082035401noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3215166191677390707.post-89513702337267728752016-09-27T08:00:00.000-04:002016-09-27T08:00:00.170-04:00Marc Methot draws criticism after controversial "Sticks Out" salute against Maple Leafs<h4>
by Capital Gains (<a href="https://www.twitter.com/Capital_gains65">@Capital_Gains65</a>)</h4>
Nearly every team in the NHL has adopted the tradition of saluting the crowd following a victory on home ice. However, for Senators this season, they will be saluting after every game; Win or lose, home or away, it doesn't matter to them.
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEitTqn1mQ2mcpImXaYP1kfAlV2JCenvHyYuBcLQcVryRxeB7lhq-K77jwmfkfijTOEeE0d9st3d0nYECaA8VODgg4MM2upx_XnbCVPp4oJenAzPHMZG0RuTCrRBIRLB49Ayg00yD9ctGlc/s1600/Wideman+salue.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEitTqn1mQ2mcpImXaYP1kfAlV2JCenvHyYuBcLQcVryRxeB7lhq-K77jwmfkfijTOEeE0d9st3d0nYECaA8VODgg4MM2upx_XnbCVPp4oJenAzPHMZG0RuTCrRBIRLB49Ayg00yD9ctGlc/s400/Wideman+salue.jpg" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">The Sens following their preseason game against the Maple Leafs</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />
<h3>
Shots Fired
</h3>
After Ottawa's 6-3 exhibition victory over Toronto on Monday night, the Senators kept with their promise to salute the crowd. Even though the game took place in a neutral town like Halifax, the "home team" Leafs were extremely offended by the Senators' gesture, and spoke their minds after the game. "It's a disgrace" Leafs forward Brooks Laich reiterated a few times. "I went bananas when I saw them do it."<br />
<br />
Via Skype, Milan Michalek, a former Senator, blamed it on the lack of leadership following his departure from Ottawa last season. "I would have never allowed this type of monkey business if I were still on the team."<br />
<br />
Rookie Mitch Marner was very surprised and angered by the Senators' actions, in what was his first confrontation with the Sens. "They just brought guerrilla warfare to the Battle of Ontario. We'll see if they're still saluting come April."
<br />
<br />
In the Senators' dressing room, all eyes and fingers were pointed to Marc Methot. Although Methot didn't play, he was still the brains behind this ordeal. Methot started by apologizing to the offended Maple Leafs, but noted that they'll understand once they hear his side of the story. "Believe me, they'll understand. They will. I bet they'll start doing it themselves once they realize that this season, the salute is more than just a thank you to the fans. It's also a salute to an old friend, a friend who meant a lot to all of us."
<br />
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiUNO93L7YdiOzRrzBkwUdrG8kFHyJR9y4VEaK1UYhsonBYQKeuPFCgT0TiWIJWmPeyl9a1oTW_VmRXYVSH7vxyHE9ckHv9h0t2WOoZP6PjEKc2VbsL0xdQyl7Q-xCKNWwWq63fgomZezQ/s1600/Harambe+Boat.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiUNO93L7YdiOzRrzBkwUdrG8kFHyJR9y4VEaK1UYhsonBYQKeuPFCgT0TiWIJWmPeyl9a1oTW_VmRXYVSH7vxyHE9ckHv9h0t2WOoZP6PjEKc2VbsL0xdQyl7Q-xCKNWwWq63fgomZezQ/s400/Harambe+Boat.jpg" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">"#tbt with the boyz" - Instagram: marcmeth3t</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />
<h3>
Sticks Out For Harambe</h3>
Prior to the salute in Halifax, Methot had been vocal on social media when it came to the infamous Cincinnati Zoo gorilla, Harambe. If you have no idea who I'm talking about, then you should be ashamed of yourself. Marc's words, not mine.
<br />
<br />
As mentioned, Methot has taken to social media to acknowledge his dear friend. From his <a href="https://twitter.com/MarcMethot3/status/776232775460335616">own tweets</a>, to liking some <a href="https://twitter.com/MannyElk/status/772172086345363456">14-A tweets</a>, to even changing his profile picture. Marc has gone all in.
<br />
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://pbs.twimg.com/media/CrdTf0YVIAI3-yG.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="https://pbs.twimg.com/media/CrdTf0YVIAI3-yG.jpg" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">This part is not a joke.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />
In his post game interview, Methot also added that he doesn't believe the meaning behind the salute is a slight to the fans. "I don't think it's a takeaway from the fans at all. We're playing for them, and we're playing for <i>him</i>. Some people say you wouldn't notice the difference in the salute, but those people are wrong."
<br />
<br />
Methot finished the interview with an inspiring statement. "He was more than just a gorilla in a poorly built exhibit. He was also my friend. So if you play hockey, win or lose, make sure to salute after the game, because he would have done the same for you. Sticks out for Harambe."
<br />
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiLD-ZaTD6SyRGOABwp3hwk3sGFod9Aqx_p90d-QfqHrvk4KZjTsUPIFc3USdQMM4lL_LqkH_Bjo1R3JDtCjTqbhys0TAP6ZIgTK-8Jm8r2BAJsocrExwkXorHct5j7Ql2DoAjGe8ernlA/s1600/Harambe+Sens.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiLD-ZaTD6SyRGOABwp3hwk3sGFod9Aqx_p90d-QfqHrvk4KZjTsUPIFc3USdQMM4lL_LqkH_Bjo1R3JDtCjTqbhys0TAP6ZIgTK-8Jm8r2BAJsocrExwkXorHct5j7Ql2DoAjGe8ernlA/s1600/Harambe+Sens.jpg" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">A stall left vacant out of respect.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
Capital Gainshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10680384558914871834noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3215166191677390707.post-86594823341989122542016-09-26T08:00:00.000-04:002016-09-26T08:00:06.300-04:00bRian's bOdycheckz S2E1: Sens Season Predictions<h4>
by bRian5or6</h4>
It's been a long summer for fans everywhere, but after a long off-season, it's finally back: bRian's bOdycheckz. Grab a beer, quit your job, put your feet up, and watch the season premiere right NOW OR ELSE I'LL FREAK.<br />
<br />
<style>.embed-container { position: relative; padding-bottom: 56.25%; height: 0; overflow: hidden; max-width: 100%; } .embed-container iframe, .embed-container object, .embed-container embed { position: absolute; top: 0; left: 0; width: 100%; height: 100%; }</style><div class='embed-container'><iframe src='https://www.youtube.com/embed/qMikuon_2dE' frameborder='0' allowfullscreen></iframe></div>
Bonk's Mullethttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03268063794977238517noreply@blogger.comOttawa, ON, Canada45.4215296 -75.69719309999999344.7060866 -76.988086599999988 46.1369726 -74.4062996tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3215166191677390707.post-25788387029167131322016-09-17T09:00:00.000-04:002016-09-17T09:00:01.424-04:00A Guide to Watching the Ottawa Senators at the World Cup of Hockey<h4>
by Bonk's Mullet (<a href="https://twitter.com/BonksMullet" target="_blank">@BonksMullet</a>)</h4>
Every time an international hockey tournament rolls around, there's a conflicting feeling when Team Canada takes on one of our beloved Sens. Sure, Canada is the best country in the world and all other countries can kiss my maple-syrup-coated ass, but I've always found Sens players to feel more "local" than someone like, say, human-swamp-thing Corey Perry.<br>
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: right; margin-left: 1em; text-align: right;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi5xwEq1AEd5BsFKKiVmVzSaiZUIEA02HJTmkP1DmtIBwLeiuitaum6IaTjMTchtnwDYpGlbG75ExYC49d2zlDZ21tFLhqxn1lcerdDEHCgDbJaUJWkkKdPQibv-T9jGceVn6L9GecnD6w/s1600/corey_perry_swamp_thing.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi5xwEq1AEd5BsFKKiVmVzSaiZUIEA02HJTmkP1DmtIBwLeiuitaum6IaTjMTchtnwDYpGlbG75ExYC49d2zlDZ21tFLhqxn1lcerdDEHCgDbJaUJWkkKdPQibv-T9jGceVn6L9GecnD6w/s320/corey_perry_swamp_thing.jpg" width="320"></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Corey Perry, "product" of Mike Babcock's "system."</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br>
Whether it was rooting for Hossa and Chara on Team Slovakia, trying to feel happy for Alfie when Sweden won gold in '06, or half-heartedly trying to care about whichever country it was that Milan Michalek was from, Sens fans have had a long history of rooting for their international foes.<br>
<a href="http://www.bonksmullet.com/2016/09/a-guide-to-watching-senators-world-cup.html#more">Read the entire post »</a>Bonk's Mullethttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03268063794977238517noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3215166191677390707.post-88179508889602810562016-09-15T07:58:00.000-04:002016-09-15T08:39:43.635-04:00EXCLUSIVE: Sens Considering 'Nuclear Option' <h4>
by Joe Boughner (<a href="http://www.twitter.com/mcllwainsworld" target="_blank">@McLlwainsWorld</a>)</h4>
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhCDLI6cGvvX_M-QdLU8XPBqA1LGu-jg3LlSUM6VoLumJuLJ7-N0327rWSaBk2k2XOgoyzHGg0pTGNFHoJlLklpFTPQ4DQtJ22H4HxyLVpgM5VZS2CP6QyOERGX7v1Ro4ggDopT2_Ukm3o/s1600/NuclearOption.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhCDLI6cGvvX_M-QdLU8XPBqA1LGu-jg3LlSUM6VoLumJuLJ7-N0327rWSaBk2k2XOgoyzHGg0pTGNFHoJlLklpFTPQ4DQtJ22H4HxyLVpgM5VZS2CP6QyOERGX7v1Ro4ggDopT2_Ukm3o/s1600/NuclearOption.jpg" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">It's weird that they're still using notebooks with the SNES logo but pictures on the internet never lie.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />
Documents uncovered by the <a href="https://media.giphy.com/media/uIzOXILP1giw8/giphy.gif" target="_blank">Bonk's Mullet Research Division</a> show the Ottawa Senators have drafted a top secret "nuclear option" for franchise success should the team fail to go on a lengthy playoff run in 2016-17.<br />
<br />
The plan would see the Ottawa Senators petition the NHL for expansion team status, despite celebrating their 25th anniversary this season - a move the plan's authors admit is "alarmingly lacking in precedent."<br />
<br />
"Based on the success of Ottawa's professional football and baseball expansion teams, we believe reverting to expansion status is the fastest way to get into the Stanley Cup Final," the plan states.<br />
<br />
The Ottawa Champions earned a berth in the Can-Am baseball league's final series this week in the franchise's second year of existence. This follows a Grey Cup appearance by the CFL's Ottawa REDBLACKS in their second season last year.<br />
<br />
The Ottawa Senators made their only Stanley Cup Final appearance nearly a decade ago and have missed the playoffs entirely twice in the last three years.<br />
<br />
The plans included some tidbits about who the team planned on drafting, were an expansion draft to be approved.<br />
<br />
"Of course we'd pick Erik Karlsson first overall. What type of moronic team would give up their charismatic, offensively skilled, <a href="http://www.sportsnet.ca/hockey/nhl/p-k-subban-trade-may-worst-canadiens-history/" title="haha it was the Habs. They are dumb.">Norris-winning defenceman</a>?"<br />
<br />
The plan's authors highlighted several risks in the plan, though, including uncertainty about how a franchise with 45 players currently under contract could participate in an expansion draft and concerns about the $500 million expansion fee.<br />
<br />
"In our interview with Mr. Melnyk, he was optimistic the funds could be raised" the report says. "When pressed for details he said 'we're due to break and renegotiate our arena naming rights again, aren't we? What's that Tesla guy up to?'"<br />
<br />
"When asked about merchandising revenue associated with a new logo and sweater, though, Mr. Melnyk was dismissive, muttering something unintelligible about just springing for new banners."<br />
<br />
<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10091792586496638962noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3215166191677390707.post-72583244536049022222016-09-12T08:00:00.000-04:002016-09-12T11:36:34.025-04:00REVIEW: EA Sports' NHL 17<div>
<h4>
by Rob Poirier <a href="https://twitter.com/robfeature" target="_blank">(@RobFeature)</a></h4>
It's almost here! The most special day of hockey's long offseason! That one beautiful day when jocks and nerds can come together as one and collectively kiss their consoles/each other! That's right: I'm talkin' about EA Sports' annual NHL video game release day! And here in '16, that video game is NHL 17 (?).<br>
</div><a href="http://www.bonksmullet.com/2016/09/review-ea-sports-nhl-17.html#more">Read the entire post »</a>Rob Poirierhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12361226710082035401noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3215166191677390707.post-34641990714171491672016-09-08T08:00:00.000-04:002016-09-08T08:00:04.072-04:00Four Things to Watch as the Senators Open Training Camp<h4>
by Joe Boughner (<a href="http://www.twitter.com/mcllwainsworld" target="_blank">@McLlwainsWorld</a>)</h4>
<br />
The wait is almost over, Ottawa Senators fans. Training camp is just a few weeks away and the team at Bonk's Mullet is preparing for another season of wall-to-wall coverage of your hometown heroes in red, white, black, heritage black, heritage white, a slightly different shade of red, and... gold?<br />
<br />
So as we all bid adieu to the stupid summer and prepare to go pasty and pale in our basements, eyes glued to our televisions, here are the four biggest storylines set to play out at the Canadian Tire Centre and sometimes Sensplex if Disney on Ice needs the rink or whatever!<br />
<br />
<h4>
</h4>
<h3>
1) Who's on First?</h3>
No, not first base, silly. Gawd, you're so silly! Thinking I meant first base. This is a hockey blog, you big silly. *Twirls hair around finger* You're such a big silly!<br />
<br />
No, I mean who is on the ice first. As in, the first line. And I specifically mean at the centre position. Though, admittedly, that part was left pretty vague. I guess you could say I like a little mystery in my life. *Twists cherry stem into a knot in my mouth*<br />
<br />
*Coughs as the cherry stem goes into windpipe*<br />
<br />
Kyle Turris has been the de facto number one centreman since Jason Spezza left town but newly-acquired Derick Brassard is expected to make a push for the crown.<br />
<br />
That's kind of all there is to say about that, actually. Now you see why I padded it with some harmless flirtation. I mean, they both play centre. And they're both pretty good, apparently. So one of them is going to be the first-line centre and one is going to be the second-line centre. That will be decided in training camp, at least until the coach changes his mind again after the season starts.<br />
<br />
Drama!<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhwygezvrSz1VlYZlUYF-RPUsP8rJv7QHGKp4rJL2_7RGEs_5wKU-ntkinue3hlvIB4GcTM_vlenU9hm84QL_sewSFERVTvP0ZqEG1k02ed296WXzwi6rjQvqPlNVPAzxF2mwzAv0u-QNI/s1600/giphy.gif" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="266" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhwygezvrSz1VlYZlUYF-RPUsP8rJv7QHGKp4rJL2_7RGEs_5wKU-ntkinue3hlvIB4GcTM_vlenU9hm84QL_sewSFERVTvP0ZqEG1k02ed296WXzwi6rjQvqPlNVPAzxF2mwzAv0u-QNI/s400/giphy.gif" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">It's funny because that's Johnny Drama from Entourage. You guys remember Entourage? It was terrible. </td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<h3>
2) Who's on... Sixth?</h3>
Ottawa's top four defencemen will be longtime stalwarts and fan favourites Erik Karlsson, Marc Methot, Cody Ceci, and then also Dion Phaneuf will be there. After that, though, things get a little bit interesting.<br />
<br />
Chris Wideman played 64 games in his first NHL season and should have an inside track at the 5th defenceman position, but who will be skating beside him is yet to be determined. Will Captain Grit, Mark Borowiecki, be an everyday player? Is Mike Kostka really our sixth-best option god help us all? Or will a prospect like Thomas Chabot or Fredrik Claesson grab on to a roster position with some strong preseason play?<br />
<br />
<a href="http://www.rosterresource.com/nhl-free-agent-defensemen-2016/" target="_blank">I'mma just leave this here</a>.<br />
<br />
You probably expected a joke somewhere in this section. But our defensive depth is no laughing matter, folks.<br />
<br />
Let's move on.<br />
<br />
<h3>
3) Who will be sacrificed to Æsbiorn: The Reaver of Souls?</h3>
<div>
One possible down note for Sens fans at this otherwise glorious time, it's Ottawa's turn to make the annual NHL sacrifice to Æsbiorn: The Reaver of Souls and, as per the concessions made in the last round of CBA talks, this year is the first year that it's Æsbiorn's option. That means the Senators don't just get to offer up some late round draft pick from seven years ago like most teams have done. </div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Some have speculated that the Norse-god-turned-soul-reaver may be up for a challenge, leading to suggestions that Curtis Lazar may be on the block, though others have argued that Lazar's overwhelming goodness and purity of being may be too much for the reaver to take. Only time will tell. </div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Æsbiorn is expected to make his choice known as part of NBC's first Wednesday Night Rivalry broadcast of the season, brought to you by GEICO.<br />
<br /></div>
<h3>
4) Who?</h3>
<div>
While most Sens fans are undoubtedly pumped to see the likes of EK65, BFnR and ... Hoffy(?), this year's camp will feature the likes of Tom Pyatt and Mike Blunden making their debuts in Sens sweaters along with AHL additions from last year like Phil Varone and Ryan Rupert. And don't forget defencemen Macoy Erkamps, who<i> is too </i>a person that exists, and Patrick Sieloff, who will be easy to spot since he'll be wearing the weight of Jason Spezza's legacy on his back!</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Granted, none of these guys carry the pedigree of Eric O'Dell, but at least when these guys lead the Belleville Senators on an improbable run to the Calder Cup you can say you saw them way back in the fall of '16!</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Well that's that, Senators fans. Happy camping!</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10091792586496638962noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3215166191677390707.post-65092472994255754992016-09-06T16:06:00.001-04:002016-09-14T22:18:51.152-04:00bRian's bOdycheckz 2016/2017 Season Promo<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhqUvV7yWT4J4V5WuvcKL2CaYPtBgQXvagn-v0LbdjQwZZNF-NPd1Ns_s07ISdrMU4B9tonQGcWP8lsUpDjiHaERRx0Elnc0ESnLiP52lx0VKgC_mIenE8_XnoXaE-C0_LdTTDbBHDv2eiJ/s1600/Promo.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhqUvV7yWT4J4V5WuvcKL2CaYPtBgQXvagn-v0LbdjQwZZNF-NPd1Ns_s07ISdrMU4B9tonQGcWP8lsUpDjiHaERRx0Elnc0ESnLiP52lx0VKgC_mIenE8_XnoXaE-C0_LdTTDbBHDv2eiJ/s320/Promo.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<iframe allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="270" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/I18IuTXdaH8" width="480"></iframe><br />
<br />
This year, Bonksmullet gave me a bigger budget to make some wicked videos. I even hired my own liquor man. Thank you Bonk....I never say this enough but I love you.<br />
<br />
Stay tuned for more Bodycheckz, THE HARD HITTING SHOW THAT BRINGS YOU ALL YOUR SENS NEEDS<br />
<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13771090264216823102noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3215166191677390707.post-74116162131132874602016-09-05T08:00:00.000-04:002016-09-05T12:54:43.750-04:00BREAKING: The Senators Hometown Tour Scandal<h3>
by <a href="https://twitter.com/Capital_Gains65">Capital Gains</a></h3>
The Sens Hometown Tour was advertised to "give fans the chance to meet Senators players, participate in interactive games, win tickets to Senators home games, win prizes and more!" However, the real intention behind the tour was mistakenly revealed this afternoon.<br />
<br />
In the past, <a href="https://pbs.twimg.com/media/CBeYQf6VEAAmboo.jpg">many great accounts</a> have fallen victim to Twitter's user experience, as it can be very difficult to differentiate between tweeting and direct messaging. It happened again earlier today—this time with the official Twitter account of the Ottawa Senators. Several tweets were sent out that seemed to be intended as direct messages to many of team's executives. The tweets have since been deleted, but luckily for you, we were able to grab screenshots of them.<br />
<br />
Please note that we blurred the faces of the photo subjects in order to protect their identities.<br />
<br />
<h3>
The Evidence</h3>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjq_HkTFnUW1ccs6gyNnnomLJf_bQIU5SAOJAq3URhYGGihAKarcfkA7t6cnsiSWU9c61_Pu0qGUZZ_0fO_Tpik4Ic42plwupXkzWfvt2uzaEUnBz_dyVXXDEITB2-SxsJf07zqeEPnx5s/s1600/grit+and+heart.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjq_HkTFnUW1ccs6gyNnnomLJf_bQIU5SAOJAq3URhYGGihAKarcfkA7t6cnsiSWU9c61_Pu0qGUZZ_0fO_Tpik4Ic42plwupXkzWfvt2uzaEUnBz_dyVXXDEITB2-SxsJf07zqeEPnx5s/s1600/grit+and+heart.jpg" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg5YU6ByP3Y_NLYyPqgvpt3L1GsZGns_DYuczyOlh3gSwNZU-WlDUXs3b46FkdXb4S2ZAgUitWW7nBKsnwPKguN909d66wzDqDwXNloLWp2QilBqU3xMlzZ3QJUwW2jAQcqDLZlppUkL6I/s1600/ofd.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg5YU6ByP3Y_NLYyPqgvpt3L1GsZGns_DYuczyOlh3gSwNZU-WlDUXs3b46FkdXb4S2ZAgUitWW7nBKsnwPKguN909d66wzDqDwXNloLWp2QilBqU3xMlzZ3QJUwW2jAQcqDLZlppUkL6I/s1600/ofd.jpg" /></a></div>
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As the pictures show, the Hometown Tour was nothing more than a scouting trip for the Ottawa Senators. Even the players were in on it, wearing hidden cameras and peppering the fans with multiple questions similar to those you see potential draft picks having to answer like, "Where are you from?", "Do you know what it means to play the game the right way?", "Define hockey culture", and "But seriously, are you from Ottawa?"<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEinvDqn5VkSbjZJTqZuj87Gb_lWcgEd94OyE827Dwgw_PoeP2wtrrw_EDhOfSi9g2Gp3_Ji6c1NTUHTwg_25Jy23EafCGzKtluei4aYetK_yxVll0Su3LoFdJI1G4FVex3X_wvrAt-ryYE/s1600/stone-paul+tweet.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEinvDqn5VkSbjZJTqZuj87Gb_lWcgEd94OyE827Dwgw_PoeP2wtrrw_EDhOfSi9g2Gp3_Ji6c1NTUHTwg_25Jy23EafCGzKtluei4aYetK_yxVll0Su3LoFdJI1G4FVex3X_wvrAt-ryYE/s1600/stone-paul+tweet.jpg" /></a><br />
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Keeping It Local</h3>
These leaked tweets confirm the ongoing rumours surrounding the Ottawa Senators and their preference for local talent. In some instances, the Senators' evaluations didn't even consider the number of goals or assists a player had in the ball hockey game, instead focusing only on the intangibles.<br />
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This mentality rooting from management has clearly made its way down to the locker room, and was on display during Mark Borowiecki's successful summer run as a <i>Whose Line Is It Anyway?</i> cast member.<br />
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It Could Be You</h3>
At first glance, the Senators' obsession with local talent may seem like a horrible situation, but there are actually some big winners coming out of this, and The Results May Surprise You!<br />
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The first winner is you, the fans, sitting at home wondering if you will ever make it to the NHL. These tweets clearly reveal that if you were born or have resided in, near, or around the Ottawa area, you are on the Senators' radar. And for those of you who don't fit that criteria, the final tweet pictured below proves that even if you are potentially driving through the Nation’s Capital, the Senators have their eyes on you.
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The second winner is the Ottawa Senators. Even with the tweets mistakenly sent out, from the Senators perspective, the 6-day tour was extremely successful. Inexpensive local talent full of heart. What more could you ask for?
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<br />Capital Gainshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10680384558914871834noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3215166191677390707.post-63142258722884567442016-06-23T11:30:00.001-04:002016-06-23T11:30:01.223-04:00BREAKING: LA Kings retroactively named 2016 Stanley Cup Champions<h4>
by Rob Poirier <a href="https://twitter.com/robfeature" target="_blank">(@RobFeature)</a></h4>
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The NHL handed out its awards Wednesday night in a ceremony that was even more cringe-inducing than usual (if you can believe that). The reason for the increased cringe factor was twofold: firstly, Drew Doughty was given his first Norris trophy. And secondly, in an unprecedented move, the NHL retroactively re-awarded the Stanley Cup.<br />
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Let's take a closer look at that first thing: Doughty, who <a href="https://www.nhl.com/news/kings-doughty-eager-to-make-case-for-norris-trophy/c-792661">began complaining</a> that he was owed a Norris trophy while the 2015-16 season was still in its infancy, finally walked away with his <strike>hard won</strike> prize last night in Las Vegas. I was in the crowd, and Doughty's win was met with... well, mostly just indifference, honestly. Turns out, no one in Vegas really cares about this stuff. But most people<i> did</i> applaud. I think I even saw one PHWA member quietly mouth the words 'you're welcome'. I myself, however, was properly appalled. Why?<br />
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This past season, Erik Karlsson scored the most points by any defenceman in 20 years, and was also the first defenceman to lead the league in assists in 40 years. He didn't just prove that he was the best defenceman to play this season... he proved that he is one of the best defencemen to play EVER.<br />
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So what kind of season did Doughty have, you ask? I mean, in order to topple Karlsson, one would assume that he must have done something equally earth-shattering, no? Maybe he just plain got <b>super defensive</b>. Like, maybe he registered the most blocked shots in a season ever? Maybe he killed a penalty single-handedly while barefoot? Or maybe he tried to justify voting Drew Doughty for the Norris trophy?<br />
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No, Drew actually didn't do much this season.<br />
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His supporters consistently give two reasons why they voted for him: (1) on a good team, his +/- was pretty good. Like, he was on the ice ALOT while other players were doing good things. And (2) come on, the guy <b>really</b> wanted to win it! How can you say no to that face?!<br />
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Regardless, Doughty sauntered up there last night, collected his gift, and we in the crowd bravely continued acting like these awards have any merit at all. But that was when Gary Bettman stepped back to the mic and made a surprise announcement that broke our brains...<br />
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"Drew? Hold on there, slugger. Get back up here. Come on, big guy. We've got a little surprise for you."<br />
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As a puzzled Doughty returned to the stage, something else joined him. A large object was wheeled out, hidden beneath a black velvet cloth.<br />
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"Now, Drew... some of our friends in the PHWA have told me that you've been a little down in the dumps lately," Bettman continued. "We know this season didn't end the way you hoped, so we got together and arranged something special for you. On behalf of both the NHL and the PHWA, I am extremely proud to declare the Los Angeles Kings the 2016 Stanley Cup Champions!"<br />
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With a flourish, Bettman pulled back the black velvet cloth, revealing the gleaming Stanley Cup. This was met with... honestly, it was pretty much just indifference again (people in Vegas really do not care about hockey, I cannot stress this enough), but a few writers here and there erupted in jubilant applause as Doughty hoisted the Cup above his head. Beside me, one of them shouted "Good for you, big guy! I love you!"<br />
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I turned to him and asked "What in the Hell is going on right now?" Tears streaming down his face, he replied "You didn't see the little tyke's face when Pittsburgh won... lower lip all tremblin' like it was... I mean, what were we supposed to do? Let Drew be sad? Fat chance! YOU EARNED THIS, SPORT!"<br />
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The NHL Entry Draft takes place June 24th. Free agency begins on July 1st. The new season opens October 12th.<br />
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Drew Doughty's campaign to win the 2017 Norris trophy starts NOW. <br />
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Rob Poirierhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12361226710082035401noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3215166191677390707.post-4038736922010272072016-06-22T22:21:00.000-04:002016-06-22T22:21:29.856-04:00Sens Right Now 003 - 2016 Draft Preview Special<h4>
by Mike Wheeler (<a href="https://twitter.com/TheMikeWheeler" target="_blank">@TheMikeWheeler</a>)</h4>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00961196745632622251noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3215166191677390707.post-30484080124557115692016-06-16T08:00:00.000-04:002016-06-16T08:00:28.221-04:00How the Sens can have the PERFECT summer<h4>
by Rob Poirier <a href="https://twitter.com/robfeature" target="_blank">(@RobFeature)</a></h4>
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<span style="font-size: xx-small;"><i>NOTE: This article is sponsored by the biggest film of the summer, "SUICIDE SQUAD", in theaters nationwide August 5th</i></span></div>
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Another long NHL season is finally over, and another spoiled franchise that everybody hates has again captured hockey's ultimate prize. Yuck. </div>
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But this is meant to be a happy article, so force that surge of vomit back down your throat and let's look on the bright side: the offseason is officially here! And between the Senators getting a new coach, losing an old defenseman, and Erik Karlsson randomly just <a href="http://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/ottawa/erik-karlsson-getting-pumped-next-season-1.3620649">flaunting his ripped bod</a>, lots has already happened. But what else <i>should</i> happen? How can the Senators turn this summer into the BEST. SUMMER. EVER?? </div>
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As usual, I have <u>all</u> the answers:</div>
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<b>MIKE HOFFMAN GETS SIGNED LONG TERM</b></div>
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At this point, I think everyone but Dave Cameron understands that Mike Hoffman is one of the NHL's elite goal-scorers, regardless of which metric you use. Hoffman is currently a restricted free agent, and after playing through the 2015-16 season on a measly $2M contract that was awarded by an arbitrator, you can bet that Hoffman will be looking to cash in. So if the Senators truly want to have the most radical summer in franchise history, they're going to have to pay the price, no matter how steep.</div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://twitter.com/gerv_rebrand">@Gerv_Rebrand</a></td></tr>
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<b>ALEX CHIASSON IS TRADED... TO THE DAMN SUN!!1!</b></div>
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Oh, you thought this was going to be a serious article?? </div>
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<b><span style="font-size: x-large;"><span style="color: red; font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">P</span><span style="color: lime; font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">R</span><span style="color: blue; font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">A</span><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">N</span><span style="color: magenta; font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;">K</span><span style="color: orange; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">E</span><span style="color: #783f04; font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">D</span> <span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Y</span><span style="color: #cc0000; font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">A</span></span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: xx-small;"><i>NOTE: This seriously deranged joke has been brought to you in the style of Jared Leto's Joker. See him in action on August 5th in "SUICIDE SQUAD" #itsgoodtobebad #darkcarnivalofsouls</i></span></div>
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For real though, Alex Chiasson is probably a good guy, but he is worse at hockey than everyone else on the team so please get rid of him if at all possible. Thank you. </div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://twitter.com/gerv_rebrand">@Gerv_Rebrand</a></td></tr>
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<span style="font-weight: bold;">CURTIS LAZAR CATCHES THE ICE CREAM TRUCK ON HIS BICYCLE</span></div>
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After years of trying and routinely coming up short, Curtis Lazar can have the most bodacious summer of his life by getting on his brand new bike and pedaling his little heart out the moment he hears that creepy jingle coming down his street. Nothing would make him feel more accomplished going into next year than securing a nice cold fudgesicle on sweltering day, or perhaps one of those baseball gloves where the baseball itself is actually a little gumball embedded in the popsicle. Do they still make those? I don't know, but I know who can find out: my friend Curti (that is not a typo, that is his nickname).</div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://twitter.com/gerv_rebrand">@Gerv_Rebrand</a></td></tr>
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<b>CRAIG ANDERSON FINALLY REMEMBERS TO PUT SUNSCREEN ON THE TOP OF HIS HEAD AND DOESN'T GET A VERY BAD SUNBURN ON HIS SCALP FOR THE FIRST TIME EVER</b></div>
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Craig Anderson, infamous for being injury-prone, can reverse that reputation and have the most tubular summer on record by simply rubbin' some sunscreen on his dome. For once, don't come to camp with a bunch of blisters and peeling skin up there, Craig! Lather that bad boy up or simply throw a hat on, my man! YOU CAN DO THIS!!</div>
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<b>CHRIS WIDEMAN ISN'T MISTAKEN FOR THE GUY WHO PLAYS JARED ON HBO'S SILICON VALLEY</b></div>
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Because it would really suck for Chris if he was.</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEih-sD8QD4H4botwIfxzkHGHvcZvn4xYQOSmw3-P_Q__HMIqN0-l341QQR4L3NLZF3dnAMh8Ht14Xs2B94D4GlBTBj1MfQDDVAAPKSmUc_sMlHVEdhwKSGtly_Hbrwv7PfWHw56hyphenhyphenLIifo/s1600/nhl46.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="395" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEih-sD8QD4H4botwIfxzkHGHvcZvn4xYQOSmw3-P_Q__HMIqN0-l341QQR4L3NLZF3dnAMh8Ht14Xs2B94D4GlBTBj1MfQDDVAAPKSmUc_sMlHVEdhwKSGtly_Hbrwv7PfWHw56hyphenhyphenLIifo/s640/nhl46.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
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<b>MIKE KOSTKA <i>IS</i> MISTAKEN FOR CHRIS HEMSWORTH</b></div>
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Because that would be really dope for Mike if he was.</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiuezYzNz0QiGWL_7H3iqnRf-DJtrdTThNeLvxhPYOJted5D59cfasOh6ePguQpP56slgsiblIIS3T4IU6od3gkBglbxgk0BFbi-F5q17tgynO4r3ZCHUI8ZurIBhFvtM6emGDdO8TO9Hg/s1600/nhl48.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="360" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiuezYzNz0QiGWL_7H3iqnRf-DJtrdTThNeLvxhPYOJted5D59cfasOh6ePguQpP56slgsiblIIS3T4IU6od3gkBglbxgk0BFbi-F5q17tgynO4r3ZCHUI8ZurIBhFvtM6emGDdO8TO9Hg/s640/nhl48.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
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<b>THE WHOLE SENATORS ORGANIZATION GOES TO SEE SUICIDE SQUAD IN THEATERS ON AUGUST 5TH</b></div>
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<span style="font-size: xx-small;"><i>NOTE: I have been compensated handsomely by the creators of "SUICIDE SQUAD"</i></span></div>
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Rob Poirierhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12361226710082035401noreply@blogger.com