Week 3 Preview: Hilarious Jokestravaganza

by Bonk's Mullet Staff

It's an odd time to be a Sens fan. On the one hand, the team is 4-1 out of the gate - a marked improvement over last year's debacle of a season opening. On the other hand, the Sens are very near the bottom of the race to the coveted Corsi Cup.

In the interest of rationalizing your cognitive dissonance as a Sens fan, we've put together this handy quiz. It's like BuzzFeed but without the funny cat pictures!

Quiz: The Sens are giving up more than 35 shots per game, how does this make you feel?

a) Like a Leafs fan last year but with the self awareness to realize this record isn't sustainable.
b) And yet they find ways to win! They're banking points and they've got time to right the ship.
c) A bit of both, sorta?

If you answered a) or b) ... well you probably should've answered c). Because it's clearly the right answer.

Be sure to share your results on every social network! Anyway, on with the show.

Stories to watch for

October 22nd vs Maple Leafs

Joffrey Lupul and James Van Riemsdyk said the support from Leaf fans at the Joe Louis Arena was better than at the ACC. Just wait until they discover the Canadian Tire Centre.

There's a cool new trend to check out for fans attending any game that the Leafs are playing in! It works a little like a tee-shirt cannon, but in reverse. Any time the Leafs are losing, Leaf fans throw their jerseys onto the ice in a show of support for their team. It's nice for Leafs fans to pay it forward after everything their franchise has given to them. I'm a Sens fan myself, but ya gotta hand it to Leafs Nation for their creativity on this one!

October 25th vs Devils

Former Ottawa Senator Martin Havlat underwent a semi-successful lip-removal surgery this week. We obtained the following photos from New Jersey team doctors:

Halvat before injury, after injury, and an artist's rendering of his fully-healed face.

New Jersey got off to a hot start, winning its first three games, but they've dropped their last two and they face a tough schedule this week. We'll be sure to monitor their play closely, but I can't guarantee we'll follow them as closely as certain individuals.

And you thought Patrick Roy was a glass banger (Photo by Matty Gervais)

October 26th at Blackhawks

Oh hey Brad Richards plays in Chicago now? Should we be worried that he's their 3rd line center?

As they go head-to-head, maybe we can finally decide who has become the better NHLer - Kyle Turris or David Rundblad?

Will Patrick Kane punch an Uber driver or does he only hit licensed and regulated taxi drivers?

Bobby Ryan prefers to drive himself to games, although he's been having some issues with traffic this week.

Tang'er? Barely even knew... there were such low, low prices available!

Wrap-up

• Team's Inexplicable Current Record: 4-1-0
• Team Injuries: Marc Methot fell down a well or something.
• Advanced Stat of The Week: 0 - The amount of turnovers Jared Cowen has committed in the past 3 games. Keep up the good work, Jared!

Have a fun week, gang.