Now What?

by Chet Sellers

As a Senators fan, even if you can hold your head up high after a season that defied all the odds, today still probably feels glummer than your prom night. But don’t worry – there’s still lots to look forward to this summer! What, you ask? Let’s find out!
Mid-June – Even though the Senators aren’t playing, some people still watch the Stanley Cup Finals. Crazy, right? But you’ll want to tune in before game 2 to watch Paul MacLean be awarded the Jack Adams trophy for coach of the year. He will point to the trophy, announce “I think everything’s right here,” and walk off.  The 417 is renamed in his honor the next day.

June 30 – It’s the draft! If you ever wanted to spend time in a half-full arena brimming with hockey hair but didn’t want to go to the Seed n’ Feed Expo, the NHL entry draft is for you. Plus it has light blue suits! Russian hockey moms! And grown men describing teenagers as “long”, “broad”, and “soft-handed”! The NHL entry draft has it all.

The Senators will be picking 17th in the first round. Unfortunately, all the franchise players are gone by that point.

July 5 – Free agency opens. With a solid young nucleus and so many up-and-comers vying for roster spots, don’t expect the Senators to make any dramatic moves, although when you have cap space and a crazy owner, you never know. Prepare to get excited about low-cost veterans, reclamation projects, and whichever team wins the Latendresse sweepstakes.  Unless Bryan Murray does something really silly, like trade a 50-point forward for a guy on Columbus’ third D-pairing.

July 11 –Although Daniel Alfredsson hasn’t officially confirmed his return, everyone starts to think it’s likely as photos suggest he’s been hitting the gym hard, particularly one where he’s shaking hands with Bryan Murray after signing a one-year contract.

August 4 – An enterprising wag starts selling bracelets with the inscription “WWRLD” (What Would Robin Lehner Do?). Fights in checkout lines at the Kanata Costco increase 200%.

August 20 – Erik Karlsson emerges on Twitter and casually announces that as summer workouts progress, he’s already skating faster than when he was 18. Within three minutes he receives over a thousand replies from Senators fans containing some variation on the word “boner”.

September 15 – On the eve of training camp, Marc Methot switches it up and posts a picture of his new haircut where he has shaved only the top of his head. Zack Smith calls him “Captain Picard” for the duration of the season, even after it grows back. Mika Zibanejad has no idea what they are talking about.

September 22 - Even though it's only a preseason game against the Habs, Paul McClone is once again spotted sitting directly behind Michel Therrien. No one knows who gave him the Jack Adams trophy that is sitting in his lap.

September 29 – In their last preseason game, a fully-healthy Patrick Wiercioch solidifies his role as quarterback of the second-unit power play when his breakout pass from deep in his own zone beats Ben Scrivens, five-hole.

October something-or-other – GAME NIGHT.
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